Delirium

Chapter 42 - Denial

a/n hiiiii.... DOUBLE UPDATE!

i hope you enjoy the chapters :')

CW// Sad.

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What did Jolie really know about love?

She wondered this as she slowly made the descending trek back to the dungeons.

She knew how it felt, at the very least. Knew she had experienced it; felt it even now. For this she was certain. She knew it made her chest ache—from affection and affliction. From longing and devotion and heartbreak.

She knew it sometimes made her say things she normally wouldn't, do things she usually couldn't.

Like ignoring the silver Prefect badge pinned to her robe's lapel as she ran hand in hand through the castle's corridors past curfew, her head thrown back in sincere laughter; instead of holding her ground and doing what she knew was right. Like breathing deeply to quell her emotions when a boundary was crossed instead of confronting the issue then and there.

Love made room for exception.

It taught compromise. Understanding. It smoothed out the edges of disagreement and sacrifice. It soothed her stubborn will, nurturing her anxieties.

But what she hadn't known was that these effects were not always for the better.

Exceptions should not be mindless acceptance. She shouldn't have to always compromise. Her will to use logic and think critically should not have been brushed aside. At least not when she was the only one doing so.

She knew this now, though.

George, on the other hand, seemed to think loving was as simple and carefree as breathing. No sacrifices to be made, no compromise necessary.

If he was her exception, he didn't know it. And he'd made it quite clear that she would never be his.

This was why Jolie hadn't even bothered to tell him of what his mother had said; the venom Mrs Weasley had spewed about her and her entire family.

He probably would have taken his mother's side.

After all, he had informed her as much. He would choose them over her, no matter what. As if she had even asked him to do that.

Jolie would never do that to him.

But, still, he had decided to make it clear to her that, if she did ask him to choose, she would not be his first choice. Because, to George, his family was the ultimate juxtaposition of hers—their love was unconditional whilst the Carrows had boundaries. His family supported one another through everything whilst Jolie's drew up ultimatums and magically-binding contracts.

Jolie would've liked to remind him of how discouraging his mother had always been to him and Fred about their plans for the joke shop.

But she was glad she hadn't stooped. She chose to end their relationship instead.

Really, Jolie should have known he would put his family on such a pedestal. Unlike her, he hadn't been betrayed by his parents. His siblings had never asked him to choose; them or her. Unlike her, his family would not experience benefits nor detriments from something as miniscule as a courtship.

Therefore, unlike Jolie, George had nothing to lose.

And, unbeknownst to her and possibly even him until tonight, he had evidently resented Jolie for it—her upbringing, her reputation, her privilege.