You Are Living In MY World ♱ Gangs ♱

The Painful Past

(Act 1 Scene 2)

"If you can look into the seeds of time,
And say which grain will grow and which will not."

"Hi, Dara. Do you know that guy?"

She hoped the woman in front of her was just a fragment of her imagination. That whoever she was facing now was just a nightmare, and soon she would wake up in her bed, leaving the dream behind to continue her day, pretending that Bae Suzy hadn't appeared before her.

But it wasn't a dream, it was real - a nightmare. She closed her eyes, suppressing the urge to scream at the sight of her.

Suzy's beautiful face regarded her, smiling as if they were long-lost friends reuniting. The Juliet with wings costume suited Suzy perfectly, making her seem like an angel—inside and out.

So, how could Dara hate her...?

Because Suzy was everything she was not.

She was overwhelmed by the unwanted memories of her high school days when she was abruptly thrown into oblivion...

"Bae Suzy will be playing the Princess on the school's Foundation Day next month," a woman in her thirties announced to the group of students from the Theater Club. "As expected," the female teacher added, smiling.

Applause erupted as the students greeted the woman, all attention fixed on her. She bowed in gratitude, a smile painted on her lips, enough to captivate anyone who looked at her beautiful face.

"Congratulations, Suzy!" they all greeted her, joyously.

"Thank you, everyone. Let's do our best." Suzy replied, graciously.

Everyone shared in the joy, except for the grim-looking woman in the corner. Dara didn't even clap, her gaze cold as she watched Suzy happily engage with her club mates, offering them acting tips.

What did she expect? That the role would be given to her instead? She snorted internally. She was aware of the holes in her socks, the faded color of her shirt, the ill-fitted school uniform she wore. There was no way she'd fit the role of a princess.

She glanced at Suzy again. Suzy looked and acted like a living princess as if she had been living such a life her entire existence.

Beautiful, popular, stylish—never repeating the same set of clothes on the school's Wash Day.

"Park, you will be the tree!" the teacher announced after assigning roles to everyone else in the play. No one paid attention to her.

She bowed, looking down. "Yes, ma'am," she whispered into the air, drowning in her own self-pity.

Last play, she was a rock; this time, she was a tree. Pathetic, she must admit. It's probably time to leave the Theater Club and join a club that genuinely cares for its members, not just catering to the popular ones.

"Suzy, let's go shopping after practice!" a girl suggested to Suzy as the teacher asked them to start practicing their lines.

"Sounds good to me. There's a dress I've been eyeing for a while. I want to check!" Suzy said, clasping her hands in front of her face, excited at the idea of shopping with friends. The boys swoon at her reaction.

Dara grimaced at that.

Suzy looked behind her, "Dara, are you coming with us?" she asked, eyes batting innocently.

She wanted to melt at the attention Suzy was giving her, her friends looked at her too. She didn't even expect Suzy to talk to her. She shook her head. "No," she answered.

As if. Suzy shops at Neiman Marcus, while Dara buys clothes at community thrift stores.

Suzy nodded as she faced her friends again and continued chatting.

It didn't escape Dara's notice when Suzy's friends nudged her shoulder, giving her a quick glance.

"Why did you invite her? You know she can't afford it," one of Suzy's friends whispered, but it was audible enough for Dara to hear.

Suzy shrugged. "Just being nice."

She gritted her teeth. Oh yeah, nice. Suzy was known for being very nice—the girl-next-door type with a ready smile for everyone. If that's not nice enough, she volunteers to help the local food pantry or occasionally cuts her hair to donate to cancer patients.

Yes, a true angel.

But in her eyes, Suzy is a villain in her life.

Suzy can wish for anything but still wants everything.

She sees Suzy as a greedy woman. To her, behind Suzy's smiles hides a facade—a "what she wants, she gets" kind of girl.

She watched how Suzy 'unintentionally' dropped her book to the ground, and her minions happily picked it up for her. Suzy only smiled at them.

A power tripper.

She wouldn't care if Suzy is a true angel in disguise or a two-faced bitch, if not for Suzy constantly coveting the roles she wants in theater plays.

She was jealous of Suzy, and she was not denying it.

"You're getting the lead role again, Suzy! No one can compete with you," her friends squealed. "Don't you want to let someone else play it this time?" They asked.

Suzy smiled at them. "The teachers trusted me with the roles. It's a good pastime too." She shrugged. "It's OK, though, it will look good on my college applications."

Pastime, pastime. That annoyed her to no end. She thinks that was the time she started hating on Suzy.

The girl who has everything thinks of what she wants the most as only a pastime. To hear that is fucking infuriating.

"...someday you will be a star...the brightest star..."

Words from her mother constantly haunt her. And she is a fool to believe it's actually going to happen someday.

And she does believe it. She's been believing it ever since...ever since that day when her mom was lying in her arms, dying as she cupped her daughter's cheeks with her bloody hands, uttering those words. The blood dripping from her wrist...

She snapped her eyes open at that. She wanted to scream inside.

Yes, Suzy triggers those memories for her. Because this woman was an obstacle in her life before. Treating this woman's existence like a tumor that had been blocking her from reaching her mother's dream, to see her own daughter on stage leading a play...that she died knowing her daughter never became the star she was meant to be.

And before she knew it, she turned her back then ran and ran until she reached a certain spot in the Kwon garden.

"Ahhhh!!!!"

Dara screamed so loud that night, hoping for the bad memories to go away...to stop haunting her...to just fucking stop.

--//--//tbc

a/n: Let's give her a hug :(