Just a Teenage Dream

Chapter 38

I remember us riding along the breezy coast. It was beautiful. The sound of the waves crashing on the sand and rocks was tranquilizing. I was slowly coming around to the idea of going to the beach with Trent Carter. He slowed down as we entered the scarce parking lot. We both got off and took off our helmets once he had parked. We took our flip flops off before walking onto the sand. Between feeling the warm sand beneath my feet and the salty air, something about the beach was very nostalgic. 

I suppose the beach for me always meant family time. Although I had my bad experiences, it was where I made my best childhood memories. Back when my parents were still my heroes.   

"We used to have a lot of family gatherings at beaches," I said. "Aunts and uncles. Cousins. Grandparents."

"That explains why you hate the beach," he responded.

We found a place on the sand to sit before getting into the water. Sheltered human beings appreciate the Sun.

"I didn't say that was my reason for hating the beach, Trent," I laughed. 

He smiled. He usually did every time I laughed. It's like he loved to be around me as much as I loved to be around him. He gave me the impression that I was his favourite person on Earth. Like I was his comfort place.

"What happened to you this week?" he asked, with great concern for his favourite human. 

I needed to get it off my chest, but I also didn't want to betray Shannon after she begged me to not tell anyone.  I stay silent while I debated with myself. It was bad intrapersonal conflict because I consider how it could be bad for Shannon but good for me, especially if I brought it to Trent's attention. I could be a good chance for me to highlight certain boundaries. Eventually I came around to selfish intentions and said: 

"I cannot be seventeen and knocked."  

His jaw dropping open struck fear in me. I prepared myself for whatever his response would. Sadly, I couldn't express that thought in any other way. He took some time to think of the best way to respond. I always appreciated the fact that he would always try to be the rational one while I was being irrational.

"Okay." he finally said. " What made you say that?" 

"One of my friends ... reached out to me, recently." I hinted.

He thought about what I was trying to say. I could tell that I made things awkward, but he tried so hard to brush it off. At the end of the day, it was an adult conversation that I felt we needed to have. Even if we weren't really using our adult phrases to express ourselves more clearly. 

Quiet and innocently, I watched the waves crash on the rocks while Trent took his time to respond without reacting.

 "I will respect your boundaries. I Pinky promise," he said holding out his Pinky. 

I always took those seriously. It was good to at least get part of it off my chest even though the other half of the truth ate away at me. Something was better than nothing.

I felt some relieve to hear him say that and he noticed that it was weight lifted off of my shoulders. "Let's go swim," he smiled. 

I removed my top and shorts to be left in my bikini. I felt uncomfortable until we both got into the water. We acted little children who saw water for the first time. 

I would say that one of the most important mistakes that teenage girls make, is believing everything from almost anyone. May sound depressing but it's not. Eventually I learnt when to stop believing. Being lied to so often trained me to be a lie detector and I could easily pick up on patterns, noticed a change in attitude and even noticed the slightest indicators through body language.

That day Trent gave me his word. I knew that he would keep his word. 

I didn't consider that there would be a price to pay.