No strings attached

12.

Phonesex.
That's what I thought he wanted to do when I picked up his call.
I knew for sure that was his intention when he dialed my number.
But things changed when we heard each others voice. He sounded so tired and I was sure he thought the same about me.
After we talked about his race, we both got quiet.

"What's wrong?" He asked softly, with a caring note in his voice, I've never heard that before.
I sighed a little. "I was just horny" I lied. He chuckled a little. "No, what's wrong Aimée?" It was the first time he actually pronounced my name right.
It was pathetic, but I felt a bubble of joy in my stomach when he said my name.
"It's just my mother, it's stupid" I sighed, he probably didn't want to hear about my problems anyways.
We weren't friends. We were just fucking around.
"It's not stupid, I'm listening if you wanna tell me" he sounded genuine.
He was making time for me, to listen to my problems.

I explained him the whole thing. My past, my problems with my mom and how she tries to talk to me again.
He listened without interrupting me.
"But you don't wanna talk to her?" He asked the question I asked myself a million times.
Did I really not wanna talk to her? What if she changed? What if she actually wanted to have a relationship with me?
"I think I'm just scared, scared she will let me down again" it was the truth - what if I put too much trust into her?
"But you won't know if you don't try" he was right, I would always wonder if she changed, always wonder if she was genuine.
I had to talk to her.
I just sighed. It was still easier said than done.
"I will come with you if you want?" He offered. "Don't make promises you can't keep" I chuckled. I obviously didn't think he was serious about that. Why would he wanna go with me?
"I never make promises I can't keep. I am serious, I'm here if you need me" he said, followed by a big yawn.
He was getting tired and so was I.
"Let's go to sleep, we will talk about it later" I laughed a little. I was sure we wouldn't talk about it anymore but I was still grateful he listened to me.

"Lando?" I said before hanging up. "Yeah?" I heard how he laid down in bed.
"Thank you" I said softly, but I meant it with my entire heart.
He was way better than all my vibrators combined.

I was so happy he would be back home tomorrow. I was looking forward to that, not only to have sex with him, but also just to be around him.

I was holding my phone in my hands. Maybe I had to text my mom, ask her to have lunch together or something.
Nothing too much, without expectations. I wasn't gonna get my hopes up.