yang jungwon - "i love you"

Start from the beginning
                                    

"Come on, you're a grown man." You try to push his hands off of you.

"Yeah, a grown man who loves his spouse." He slurs out. His breathing has gone shallow and his eyes are beginning to shut. You frown and gently pat his cheeks. You turn him around and splash water on his face, making him cry out and send you a look. You smile slightly then brush his teeth as you would a small child. Once that's finished, you drag him back to bed and tuck him under the blankets. He's started shivering, so you go to collect more fleece blankets before going down to kitchen to whip up some more tea.

As you wait for the tea to steep, you lean against the cold kitchen counter, staring at the backsplash and thinking. Jungwon had said he loves you, but that doesn't seem right. He certainly didn't love you in that way when you got married, even if you did care for each other to an extent. A small part of you is hopeful that things have changed. The rest of you is doubtful and believes it's something he's said in his feverish daze. Once you've stared at the wall for a thorough amount of time, you uncover the tea and remove the teabag, slowly walking up the stairs with the mug so it doesn't spill.

You set the mug down on the nightstand and tap Jungwon's shoulder. He stirs very slightly in his fevered sleep. His hair sticks to his forehead and the sight makes you hope that he'll just sweat the forehead off, that it'll pass easily. "Hey, Jungwon." You tug the blankets off of his shoulders and his eyelids flutter open at the feeling. He clutched himself in a hug and frowns, his dimples set deep in his cheeks before he looks up at you. "Oh." He begins to sit up against the headboard. You reach out to help but he's already up and smiling at you, although uneasily. "You think I'm a liar." He finally says. You furrow your eyebrows, "What? I don't-"

"You do." He smiles then reaches out, "Tea?" You place the mug in his hands, still flustered and confused. "Call me if you need anything, I'm going to...go tell your job that you're sick and then tell my job that I'm sick so that I can take care of you. And, uh- I'll be back soon to check you're temperature."

Jungwon watches you carefully. He sips his tea. "You don't have to."

You, already halfway across the room, pause and stare at him. "Have to what?"

"Take care of me. But you do." He smiles again, so very charmingly. You wonder how he can be so composed when he has a raging fever and, moments earlier, was stumbling around in a daze.

"You don't understand. I have to." You don't wait for an answer as you exit the room and close the door behind yourself.

———

"I'm back." You appear in the room, whispering in case he were asleep. Instead, you find Jungwon peering at you over the top of a book that he seems wholly uninterested in. He cracks a smile, "Hi." He says softly. You can't help but smile back as you walk over. "I brought this thing." You motion to the device in your hand that, when hovered near his forehead, will present you with his temperature. He sets down his book as you take his temperature. The device beeps a couple of times. Definitely a fever, but not so high that it's dangerous. You sigh in relief. "Are you hungry at all?" You reach out daringly to take Jungwon's hand, which is laying gently on his book. He smiles at the sight which makes you want to take further risks. "Not really, but you'll make me eat, won't you?"

"As long as it's not a stomach bug it's better you eat. You don't have any nausea, right?" You furrow your eyebrows then let your expression rest when he shakes his head. "Alright, I'll go make you some jam and toast." You try to slip away but he grasps your hand and squeezes, bringing you to a full stop.

You whirl around, staring at him in confusion. "What?"

Jungwon laughs and leans his head against the headboard, "Why won't you let me care?"

You scoff, "Obviously because you don't. Not that way at least."

Jungwon raises his eyebrows, "Oh, yeah? Then why are you taking care of me when you could get anyone else to do it?"

"None of your business." You try to pull your arm away but he doesn't budge. Jungwon rolls his eyes, "It's literally my business."

"Not when you have a fever, let me go."

Instead, Jungwon pulls you closer, a silly delirious little grin overtaking his features. "I know you like me."

You shake your head, hoping that in his strange fevered state he won't remember this come the next morning, "Yeah, I like you. Not vice versa."

Jungwon's bleary eyes brighten slightly, "See." He says, "That's what I was looking for..." He trails off as his eyelids become heavy and he lets out a sigh. You sigh as well, exasperated and slightly embarrassed, "Okay can I go make you toast now?"

"No." Jungwon becomes conscious again from his half-asleep state and makes eye contact. You frown and brush your hand over his hot cheek, "Why?"

"Sit with me?"

You laugh, "Want me to tell you a story too?"

Jungwon rolls his eyes, "I'm serious. Y/n."

"And you have a fever."

"Stop being stubborn!"

"You're stubborn!" You throw up one hand for dramatics since the other is still taken hostage in his hold.

"I love you!"

You freeze. "You...have a fever."

"Forget the stupid fever, I've been waiting to tell you this. The fever is an inconvenience. I love you." He repeats, "Why won't you believe it?"

"Because- because, why?" Your shoulders droop and you feel him reach out a hand to hug you closer.

"Because you're my friend and my spouse. I want something more with you then pretend." His hot fevered touch passes over your cheek and your ear as he lets a hand drift over a section of your hair. You sigh and finally let yourself smile a little. "Me too. I want something more."

"Then let it be more." He bumps his hot nose against yours and then leans your forehead against his. You smile for a moment more until you let it drop, "Alright lover boy, but you're burning up- and shivering." You touch his arm gently. "I'll go make you some toast then you take a nap, okay?"

"Okay." Jungwon says through a daze. You roll your eyes and press a hesitant kiss to his cheek, making him squeeze your hand. Finally he lets go of your hand so you can leave.

When you're at the door, he calls out, "You didn't say it back."

You pause, hand on the door handle and smile, "I love you."

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