Abhira 3.0 - Healing

SS - Regrets (2)

A/N: Here's the next part. Thank you so much for the positive feedback so far! I'm sorry, I know I said this would have Abhi's POV, but we're getting there, I promise! There's a lot that needs to be addressed, so it'll come little by little.  I look forward to your feedback on this as well :)

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Abhimanyu

As he listened to Akshara pour her heart out, it hit him all over again, just like when he had talked to Shefali bhabhi. Why hadn't he talked to her about this? On that day, as much as he was in pain, so was she. Neil meant something to her too. Their kids were hers too. He didn't realize when his tears started flowing, but they didn't seem to stop, and he also didn't let them.

Ek sach batau? Tum naraz mat hona, par maine bade papa se jooth bola tha. Maine to soch liya tha, ki tumhaare bina me kaise jeeungi? Shayad mumma/papa ke paas jaake mujhe sukoon mile.

His whole being stilled as he took in what she just said, his steps almost faltering. It felt like someone stabbed his heart, and then twisted the knife deeper inside. She was going to harm herself? Potentially leave this Earth? How could this happen? What would have happened to him if she had taken this step? Yet another wave of guilt and anger washed over him.

Par tumhe kyu bura lag raha hai? Yeh jazbaat tab kaha the? 7 mahino mein, ek baar call nahi kiya tha. Jab tab farak nahi pada, toh ab kyu?...his inner conscious taunted him. It's true, he thought. Why is it affecting him now, when he didn't even bother to check in on her after she left - no, after he told her to leave. He let his anger drive her away from him, but the least he could have done was made sure she was okay, she had miscarried for god's sake, but he didn't even do that! He gripped the tree hard, hoping the pain it caused would counter even a fraction of the pain that was enveloping his heart and mind.

Akshara/Abhimanyu

"Par don't worry, mai kuch kar nai saki. Kyunki jab mein Pathankot pauhchi, tab mujhe pata chala ke humara ek baccha zinda hai. Mai bata nahi sakti ki mai kitni khush thi Abhi, humara ek baby, hume chod ke nahi gaya tha. Maine tumhe phone kiya, bahot baar kiya, taaki mai tumhe bhi yeh khushkhabri sunau. Taaki tum mujhe aake le jao, aur hum dono ek nayi shuruwat kare. Ek chotu sa family bane hamara, hamare baby ke saath." Putting her knees down, she placed her hand gently on her stomach remembering when she found out Abhir was still there. A gentle smile formed on her face recollecting her thoughts, before turning sad again.

Abhimanyu gave a sad smile at the mention of Abhir, his Junior. Wiping his tears away, he still stood in the same spot, too scared to go near her, selfishly wanting her to continue, to know what all she went through. He knew it would kill her to relive the darkest days of her life, but he also knew that she would feel lighter having all the pain, frustration and anger spoken and cried out.

"Par tum ne mujhse baat karna manzoor nahi tha. Tumne to keh diya ki na tume mere baare mai kuch sunna tha, naahi humare bacche ke baare mein. Bahot gusse mein the tum, aur tumhari in baato se mujhe bhi gussa aaya. Itna, ki maine gusse mein aake Abhinav to thappad bhi maarliya. Uske badd, mai apni dost ke vaha gayi, aur maine vaha bade papa ko dekha. Mann kiya daud ke unhe gale lagau. Mujhe laga tha ki shayad tum bhi aaye honge unke saath, par tum nahi the. Maine socha, koi baat nahi, mai unke saath vapas Udaipur aajungi aur thode dino ke baad, jab tumhara gussa shaant ho jaaye, tumse baat bhi karlungi. Par jab maine unki baatein suni, tab mai phir toot gayi. Unhone kaha ki sab meri wajase hua hai, aur sab mujhse naaraz hai. Tum to mujhse koi rishta nahi rakh na chahte, isiliye tum nahi aaye. Bade papa ne bhi mera saath nahi diya. Unhone kaha ki shayad humara dur rehna hi sahi hai. Tab maine decide kiya ki mai vaapis nahi jaaungi. Kisiko mera dukh, mera dard dikh hi nahi raha tha. Sab ne kuch na kuch khoya thaana? Maine bhi...toh mujhe hi kyu sabse dur jaana pada? Hamesha mai hi kyun? Shayad kisine mujhe apnaya hi nahi tha. Isiliye sab ke liye aage badjaana aur mujhe bhool jana itna aasaan tha."