Never Really Over

Chapter 49

"Why do you always pull that stupid face?"

Colin's question, and the disdainful tone that accompanies it makes Beth's skin prickle in annoyance. She's not pulling a face, she's just doing her make-up with her phone propped up with the camera on whilst she chats to him. It's not even 8am but he's already at his desk with his steel mug of black coffee next to his keyboard. He wears a suit, even though he's working from home, which amuses Beth as she has spent the past year working in her pyjamas. In the summer, she didn't even bother with any trousers.

As Beth frowns, her reflection looks back at her, complete with ever deepening lines on her forehead. She shudders over the fact she is visibly aging and lets her eyes scan the mass of tubes and bottles laid out on the desk in front of her in search of her concealer. Perhaps she needs more than she thought?!

"It's my fish face," Beth says unabashed as she dabs at her imperfections that are only highlighted by the illuminated mirror.

"Your what?"

Beth glances at her phone screen and thinks bitterly how ugly Colin looks when he frowns. She's the first person to admit she can be too quick to judge someone by their appearance, but Colin takes things a step too far in her opinion, he is obsessed with what other people might think. Beth knows he thinks her expression makes her look stupid and he's worried people will judge his choice of bride.

Quite frankly, he's a snob.

May 2021

"You need to calm down Beth. You're being too loud."

Beth laughed loudly at Colin's inadvertent quoting of Taylor Swift. In her drunken state she almost asked him if he even knew who Swifty was, given that every time they got in the car he'd switch on Classic FM as though he was trying to impress her, when she knew for a fact that when he was alone, he listened to Smooth, singing along at the top of his lungs to golden oldies with the window down. Which in Beth's opinion was almost was sad as Classic FM.

"And I'm just like oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh," she sang back, but Colin wasn't smiling.

Seemingly never-ending pandemic restrictions had meant that very few of Colin's friends and family had had the pleasure of meeting Beth, so dinner with one of the partners and his (much younger) wife, was a big deal for him. Everyone was intrigued to meet the girl who had done the unthinkable and made him focus on something that wasn't work. He had been determined the night would be perfect. He'd booked a Michelin star restaurant and had even bought Beth a dress he knew would be perfect.

"You look like Audrey Hepburn," he had beamed as he finished zipping Beth into the little black dress. "So elegant," he had kissed her neck appreciatively.

Beth studied her reflection in the full-length mirror and tried to force a smile. She didn't want to look like Audrey Hepburn, she wanted to look like herself and this dress that skimmed her knees and covered her entire chest was not her. It reminded her of something her mum would wear to a funeral.

"Is that what you're wearing?" Colin was now standing in front of the mirror, watching Beth's reflection as she chose a pair of leopard print heels from the shelf on her side of the wardrobe.

"They're fun," she shrugged. They would help her feel more herself, brighten up her outfit a bit. She was nervous about meeting Colin's friends, and she wanted to create a good impression. She wanted them to know that she loves clothes and fashion. That she has an actual personality despite what her dress might suggest.

"Why don't you wear those Louboutins?! I've never seen them out of the box?!"

Colin thought Beth's shoes were tacky, she could tell by the way he kept glancing at them as though they were a pair of jelly sandals. The Louboutins would look classier, she had to concede Colin was right about that, and they were very her. The red sole fitting of her fierce personality. But she would not be wearing them because like the Birkin that had made the move from her apartment to Colin's house in its dust bag and box, the shoes were a gift from John and Beth tried her hardest to avoid anything that reminded her of him. Apart from the City result, she could never stop herself from keeping an eye out for that.