ceaseless// 5SOS

33

Gabi

"I'll be waiting in this spot right here, try and be back in time, please. Is Ezra having a lift?"

"He said he's already out, so no thanks,"

"Okay,"

"I need your help carrying the food,"

"Pass it here,"

"I can't pick it up. It's too heavy,"

He lifted it off my lap and kissed the top of my head, then climbed out the car, so I did the same. Though I felt a lot better, I was still really weak, especially when I got tired.

She was already waiting outside to let us in, then we went up to her flat, in awkward silence. I'd upset her quite a bit.

"We made you this chilli," dad said, "Do you have space in the fridge?"

"Erm, I don't know,"

"I'll bag it up and freeze it for you while you guys talk. Then I'll be down in the car,"

"It's the second drawer... thank you,"

She let me into her room and shut the door behind me, quickly tearing up.

"Are you okay now?"

"A bit better. I can't carry much, still got this," I said, showing the central line they put in my chest.

"I did want to visit. I tried,"

"I know, I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything I said, and it's not an excuse but I was really sick and I was mad at everything, and I knew seeing you would make me feel better so I just got upset. I'm sorry,"

"You're really mean when you're sick," she said, laughing slightly, but crying, "It hurt when you said I didn't care,"

"I'm sorry,"

"I know," she said, hugging me, "I missed you,"

"I missed you too,"

"You're going to the support group, right?"

"Yeah,"

"Good,"

"I don't feel very well,"

"Lay down, have some rest,"

"I'm really sorry I hurt you,"

"I'm fine... I still love you, so much,"

She ushered me over to her bed and laid down with me, placing a kiss on my cheek. Then, she put her arm round me and kissed my neck, before nuzzling into me.

"We both misunderstood each other,"

"Do you forgive me?"

"Of course I forgive you,"

"Okay,"

"You should have a rest. When do you have another checkup?"

"Soon,"

"Good. I'll try and see you this weekend, I'll come over and watch movies,"

"Thank you,"

"You don't have to thank me,"

I shut my eyes and relaxed in her hold, convincing myself she was really okay because I didn't believe her. She gently played with my hair, and hummed, until my phone started ringing which she answered for me. Even though we didn't talk, it was clear we had forgiven each other, and it felt so normal to be in her hold. I had missed her so much, we had been more distant every since summer ended.

"That's your dad, he wants you back now. Here, I'll get your shoes back on,"

She slid them on and helped me up, rushing to the kitchen to get me some water before I left. I used her body to keep me upright until we got to the car, and I slid inside, letting her put my seatbelt on.