The Misadventures of Karina and Daemon

T h eU g l i e rT r u t h (D)

Karina's reaction shut down my system. Seeing her expression gamut from confusion to frustration to hatred to guilt slowly rip my being apart. She looked like she was in a trance. I wanted to grab her and put her inside my arms to spare her from feeling insecure. But I myself cannot move my body. I didn't expect to be pulled back into a shock upon seeing all unwanted emotions flood her face. It is so damn painful to see her shattered in front of me. When I came out of it and started to reach her, she's backing away and threw the door. That totally woke me up. I tried to call her name. I stayed for several seconds until I hear her brief excruciating howl.

Then Linda came. She's about to go to Karina to check on her. But then she sees me standing shaking and was in a cold sweat, then she heard Karina's out-pour, she immediately brought me back to my room. I told her what happened and said I'd better make a decision.

How do I make a decision?

How can it be easy to choose between God and her? It's been two days since I last visited my sanctum. I can't look at Him. I was with Him for almost half of my life, then all of a sudden, in such a short number of time, I have given Him a rival. I just have to admit this. But Karina's share of my heart is as big as my share of Him now I want to serve Him with all my heart and soul. But how can I do it when I know the other part already belonged to someone else?

What about Ethan? And mum. God. Mum. This will derange her all over again.

I gaze at the hurly-burly in the ocean. Lovers giddily chasing each other, lovers arguing over the real hue of the sunset's reflection in the water, families spreading themselves over the Malong, children burying other children in the warm sand and other beach goers strolling in the shore laughing and teasing each other. Some are serious and deep in thought. I wonder if there's anybody here undergoing same ordeal as mine.

The beach perfectly depicts the bustle inside my head. I have never doubted myself with the vocation. Now I don't know if I can be trusted with it. I would not have any difference from those who brings ignominy to the church. But my heart learned to forget Cassandra when I started going in Agustus Academe.

Although from what I feel right now, I don't know how long.

"Did it ever occur to you that this place is such a blissful place? A paradise."

I turn to find Mark creating ripples on the water. I smile at him and gaze back in the water.

"Always. Despite of some issues attached to this place brought about by nuisance beach goers." I said.

"Right. Whatever humans do to this place, the natural essence of the beach is still intact." I look at him. "How are you brother?" he ask

"I'm fine." I said without breaking eye contact.

"Good. That's good."

We're silent for a while. He continued throwing pebbles. Then Mark cut to the chase. I just knew it from his tone he's heading this way. "You know what Daemon, nothing you will do now that could mar the reputation you have built for yourself. Why are you closing yourself too much?"

I sigh. I don't think they get the weight of this vocation. It's like one second you decide to be in and another second you can simply take it back. It sadden me that they consider the clergy as just an ordinary menial job. Capable to be dispose of if another job opportunity opens. Maybe there are things that corrupts the image of the church, but if everyone of us cease to trust her and her people, where would the world go from there? I think that if we want change, we can start it in ourselves.

And this is why I want to stay. I shake my head.

"Mark, I'm not closing myself. Not to anyone. Not to anything. I already made a choice long time ago. If anything, I don't regret a bit of this decision." I tap his back. I was about to walk away when our bellhop comes running frantically towards us.

"Sir Daemon, kadtu anai sa inyu hotel. Si mama mo ug Ms. Samantha gakuyugay sa imung room." he said panting. Sir Daemon, please go back to your hotel. Your mom and Ms. Samantha is fighting in your room.

"What? Mum is here?"

"Bag'o laang siya nag-abot Sir. Kanang si Ms. Karina bang ara room 404, ging singgitan ning mama mo." Just now, Sir. She shouted at Ms. Karina, the woman in room 404.

"What?!" I scampers on the sand and run to the hotel. Mark follows behind. I try to dodge the guest on our way to the elevator then push the button repeatedly.

"Dee calm down." Mark cooed

"No Mark. No."

"Why do you think Tita Claudia knows about her?"

"The elevator." I said. Then the elevator opens. We hurried in without waiting for it to deliver out the all the passengers.

"Sorry." Mark says to them repeatedly. When the door close, I smash and kick the mirrored-wall. "Dee, stop it." Mark pulls me away. I can see my reflection cracked in it.

It opens on the third floor and we scamper out up to my room. My door is open. Karina is standing crying in the doorway while Mum and Samantha exchange a deadly stare at each other inside.

"What's going on in here?" I look at Karina's tear-soaked eyes then to mum and Samantha. They both look at me. Samantha remained on her feet. While mum's face split into a motherly grin.

"Oh Ethan baby you're here now."

"His name is Daemon, Claudia!" Samantha hollers angrily.

"Sam, please--

"No Daemon! Can't you see? She's crazy. He's not looking at you Daemon. He's looking at Ethan. And for heaven's sake, Ethan is dead!" her voice thundered across the room. Then a loud slap echoed around. I see Karina flinch.

"Mum!" I shout pulling her away. Samantha's head move in the sides but she twitch her bleeding lips into a smirk. Her eyes are blazing than ever.

"Daemon, listen to me, this woman in front of you is a monster. You know why?" I close my eyes. Bracing myself for her words.

"Samantha.. Calm down." a soft shaky voice came in.

I turn to see Linda holding her chest. She's standing behind Mark and Karina. Samantha looked at her and shakes her head then she turned to me. "When you were in a coma, this woman did nothing but scout faith healers to bring back Ethan's life. She talked about nothing but Ethan and the seminary. Day in. And day out. She always positioned herself in front of your world-shut face and talk to you about getting in the seminary and taking up Theology. The doctor---

"Oh shut up!" Mum said rather coolly.

"The doctor said that you can hear us so that's what she did. Fed you with things Ethan would do. Then one day, you woke up and said to the doctor you want to become a priest. You didn't remember anything. Even what happened to Ethan. The doctor said you snapping out from a 2-year shocked and saying you want to become a priest is not normal. But mum insist you were fine. That that's your plan beforehand. Then the doctor said that if you will have a dream about Ethan or anything that bothers you, you tell him. I just learned lately that you have a recurring dream about Ethan. And you told him. And he told Mum. That's why it keeps on occurring. It always cause sleep paralysis but they're not doing anything because it's not fatal. Then she construct an alarm just to put up whatever stunt she's pulling." she talk in a trance. Then she look at me with waterlogged eyes.