Heat Wave (Disaster Series #2)

Kabanata 21

Mistakes

Everything happened lightning fast between me and Gon just the other day. We just suddenly had this understanding that we're going to know each other once again. Some might think that it is so impossible after so many years of zero communication.

Well, I still even feel that everything between us is surreal.

But then, on the other hand, we don't need to waste any more time. Seven long years already went down the drain.

Kaya kailangan pa ba naming magpaligoy-ligoy pa? We're not getting younger after all. I'm twenty-three now. And he's what? In between twenty-nine or thirty.

Kahapon pa lang kami nagkita pero gustong-gusto ko na namang makita siya ulit. Maybe he's already in the clinic for his therapy session.

To be honest, I'm risking it all here. He is not my client, but he is one in the clinic where I work at. So, being closer to him might possibly ruin my work reputation.

I don't want to make more crass and irrational decisions so I need to talk to him today. We didn't get to exchange numbers yesterday so it's better if we meet today. Somewhere a bit far away from this city, perhaps?

Uminit ang pisngi ko sa mga lugar na naiisip. Sa mga naii-imagine ko pa lang ay parang nagpaplano na ako ng buong bakasyon kasama siya. Kami lang dalawa.

May nanatili pa rin pala talaga sa dating ako. My feelings towards him remained. And then there's my rusty flirting skills. You can't blame me for being such a noob at this, though. Siya lang naman ang tanging nilandi ko sa buong buhay ko.

Kaya ngayon ay parang hindi ako mapakali habang nag-aayos ng sarili. And for the first time, I felt conscious about what outfit to wear. My first option is an office or formal attire. But I think I will look stoic in this while talking to him. So, I changed into something casual instead.

Ilang ulit ko pang pinasadahan ng tingin ang sarili sa full-length mirror ko. I kept looking at my bold lipstick and wondering if it's too much. Nude's my go-to color after all.

Sobra-sobra ang anticipation kong makita siya kaya nang dumating ako sa clinic at naghintay sa lobby, bahagya lang akong nabigo nang wala siya.

When Milly entered the clinic all bubbly and energetic, I stood up and went to her right when she just stepped inside the doors.

"Hi Milly! Good morning. Hindi ba maaga ang therapy schedule n'yo ng client mo?" I smiled at her, trying to mask my anticipation.

"Good morning. Magsi-sign pa lang kami ng contract this afternoon." She smiled back.

And that's what kept me hanging until the afternoon. I even waited 'til five for Gon to come out of Milly's office but he didn't. I don't even have the guts to ask Milly about him. That will only arise suspicions about our connection with each other. 

Malapit nang magsara ang clinic nang napagpasyahan kong umuwi na lang sa apartment. Bahagyang nanlulumo at nagsisimula na sa pag-o-overthink.

I can't even apply everything that I've learned as a therapist to myself right now. Gon completely messed that up the moment he came into my office.

What if that conversation was just a closure for the past? What if he only meant that he wants to know me once again so we could be friends after everything? Because he is engaged with Celest Gabriel, after all.

I didn't know I could still be stupid after all the years that have passed.

Kaya nang pauwi na sa apartment ay nagawa ko pa talagang pumunta muna saglit sa isang store para makabili ng dalawang bote ng alak.