Chapter 11

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New chapter. I wrote a bit of this in Josh's POV so don't expect really good writing cuz I'm not so good at writing POVs of boys seeing as I'm not a boy. Anyways, enjoy!!!

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We accept the love we think we deserve-Bill, The Perks of Being A Wallflower.

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(Josh's POV.)

Kayla just broke up with me. Kayla Walker, my girlfriend (make that ex) just broke up with me. For some reason, I feel numb about it. Should I be happy? Should I cry? Should I have a party to celebrate? Should I apologise? I just don't know. Someone should have written a book about dating. That would be useful now seeing as I don't even know how I should feel right now. I can't be happy because-I have to admit- Kayla looked a bit sad when she broke up with me and I can't be sad because I am not. I never liked Kayla. It was all because of my stupid mistake so why can't I just be happy? That would just make me cruel and selfish. But who cares if I'm selfish? I don't have to be nice all the time, do I? I have to do some things for myself right?

And here's the most insane thing. Right now, I'm not even thinking of Kayla, how she's probably crying to her friends, getting a huge group hug, her friends trying to comfort her by saying things like: he's just a jerk anyways and he's such a dick. I don't care. The insane thing is that I keep thinking of Vonnie. Right here on my bed playing Call Of Duty, the only person I can think of is Vonnie. I must be crazy. Seeing as she didn't even want to talk to me. After Kayla came in, we continued our dancing and it became really awkward because it was obvious that Vonnie was avoiding me. Dan kept reminding her to keep eye contact but she kept lowering her eyes. I don't know what I did wrong? Does she feel bad? She was never friends with Kayla so why would she? Girls are so difficult to understand.

After rehearsals, Vonnie ran out quickly, not bothering to say anything to me. I thought I heard her sniff as she passed by. Why would she be crying? Isn't this what she wanted? Or did she not like me? Then what was all the flirting for? My head is beginning to ache from all this uncertainty. I dropped my game pad and was about to take a quick nap when dad came into my room, not even bothering to knock and in his hands were-guess what?- a copy of the Bling magazine.

"Josh! What is this?" My dad asked. I could see my mum just outside my room and she had that look that told me that my dad was about to yell at me.

"A magazine," I said lazily as I flopped on my bed and covered my head with a pillow.

Dad came over and flung the pillow away from me. "And what do you see on the cover of the magazine?" He asked impatiently. He was really mad.

"A bunch of pics of me and Vonnie." I said. I was being rude, but I didn't care. My dad was overreacting. Just like everyone else had been, even Vonnie. Was I the only one that didn't see this as a big deal? Kayla and I broke up, so what? Anyways if anyone was being yelled at, she should be the one not me, she broke up with me if I remember correctly.

"A bunch of pics? A bunch of pics? Are you insane?" My dad yelled. I could see his veins bulging on his neck. Mum came in and tried to calm him down but it didn't really work.

"Am I insane? I think so? I feel numb. Not sad or happy, just numb." I said, not even bothering to look up at my dad.

Dad sat down on my bed beside me and put his head in his hands. Mum stood beside him, a comforting hand on his back. "Do you have any idea what this could do to your career?" He asked silently. "Do you want to be seen as a man whore? What were you even thinking, having what a cuddle with Yvonne outside the studio? Outside the studio! Like you were inviting the press, hey look at me, take a pic. What were you thinking? Taking her on a date, holding hands and even giving her your shirt."

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