Lessons of the Heart and the Liquid it Pumps ||

66: Selfish Bonds

Matthew held up a dress, smiling to me as his eyes darted from me to it. “I think you’d look marvelous in this style.”

I looked at the short black dress before giving him a slightly put off look. “No way.”

He looked to the dress than back to me, his emerald eyes laced with disappointment. “You haven’t liked any of my suggestions.”

The hurt tone to his voice surprised me and I looked away from him, not wanting to give in. “Well they just aren’t practical,” I explained, not wanting to hurt his feelings either. “They look pretty, sure, but I can’t exactly wear that to class.”

“No, I suppose not.”

For a long moment he looked down at the dress, running the black fabric between his fingers. “Does your type wear these types of things often?” I found myself asking. I hadn’t realized that everything he’d picked out had been far from every day wear. Every shop we went to he was holding up dresses and skirts, vests and shawls, not to mention all sorts of gaudy jewelry.

“Sometimes, yes,” he answered, nodding before looking up at me. “Most get dolled up for the Games.”

The Games. The words rebounded in my head as I remembered what had occurred earlier with Francis. “We should get it then,” I instructed him, reaching out to set it in the basket.

I’d expected him to look pleased; instead a confused expression crossed his face. “What brought about this change of decision?”

“Well,” I started, my hand still hanging in midair, “if this is what is worn to the games it would be a good idea to get it. I don’t want to stick out too badly. Last thing I need is for more attention to be drawn to me, don’t you agree?”

“You plan on attending the games?”

His question confused me and I furrowed my brow, lowering my hand back to my side. Just what sort of a question was that? “Isn’t that what we told Francis?”

Matthew nodded, his eyes scanning me slowly before looking back down to the dress. “Well, yes admittedly I did,” he said, his fingers still running over the fabric. “However, I did not expect you to actually attend.”

“You didn’t?”

“No, I did not,” he responded with a small shake of his head and a sad smile. “As you can imagine, there are a lot of my kind at such an event and you seem to have a strong dislike for us.”

I couldn’t stop the guilt from creeping into me. “It’s not that I don’t like you,” I tried to explain, “it’s just that my body gets alarmed by you.” Matthew had just saved me no matter how I looked at it. Perhaps not my life, but my mind definitely. I don’t know what I would have done if Francis had continued in the direction he had seemed to be taking things. I would have had no choice but to call on Collin and risk getting him into huge trouble.

Matthew’s face softened as he nodded, stepping forward to brush my hair behind my ear as he smiled down towards me. “I know child.”