𝒟𝑜 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎 𝓈𝑒𝑒 𝓂𝑒? (𝒟𝒶𝓂𝑜𝓃 𝒮𝒶𝓁𝓋𝒶𝓉𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝒳 𝐹𝑒𝓂𝒶𝓁𝑒 𝑅𝑒𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓇)

Ch 16: Consequences

"Ow.", I grunted. My hand moved to brace the back of my temporarily sore neck. I was becoming aware of my surroundings, I find myself lying on the earthy ground. I moved my head towards the right, seeing Elena lifeless on the ground from afar with Klaus standing next to her. "Finally, the time has come.", Klaus smiled in malicious triumph. He rose his content face towards the sky, waiting for something to happen. There was nothing happening but the purest of silence.
Klaus had sensed my troubled breathing. His focus shot directly towards me and smugly walked to the thicker patch of pine needles I had been lying on. He crouched down, grasping my chin harshly with his fingers. "Everything I had ever longed for happened with grace. I have finally broken the vampire-werewolf curse. No thanks to you, my darling relative, for being a pain in my ass.", Klaus huffed. He looked towards my left, his sadistic smile appeared back onto his face. He forced my head to look in the same direction, "...for not successfully saving dear Jenna". The horror I felt seeing the visible black veins on Jenna's cold and gray lifeless body.
"What have I done?", I whispered shakily, feeling both distraught and mortified. A sentence kept blindly repeating in my head, "It's all my fault". Klaus deeply inhaled my potent scent of guilt, "Yes, dear Y/n. Really soak in the self loathing you have put upon yourself. It's quite sad, really". He tossed me like a rag doll once more. "Although you surely have my father's filthy bloodline, I assure you that you are one of the up most importance's' in my plan yet Little Hybrid.", he spat, before leaving like always.
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(TRIGGER WARNING!!!!)

I moved myself onto my knees, screaming in the worst kind of emotional pain. I leaned desperately towards Jenna, yanking the wooden stake from her gray corpse. The gut-wrenching pain my heart endured within those few moments became so overwhelming. I kept repeating, choking on each word that soon sounded less clearer than the one before, "It's all my fault". I had lost the very most important people in my life: Jenna, Elena, and Damon. I raised the stake, having it only inches from my beating heart. I was ready to end it all. I tried remembering the best moments I had with them...

"What's so funny?", Damon asked defensively, it was clear he was frustrated. I was laughing so hard, I could barely breathe when trying to compose myself. "You're so cute, you know that?", I heavily breathed out. His brows were furrowed and his lips were slightly pouted. Yet somehow his piercing frosted blue eyes always found his way to my soul. I walked up to him, holding my arm out. He mistook that gesture by gently grabbing my hand and placing a soft kiss on top of it. I pulled my hand away, "Damon, no- as much as I loved what you did right now- just turn around for a second, please". He looked at me, embarrassed. Damon turned around, revealing a piece of cloth with words on it. It was taped onto his shirt. The writing said, "Cranky 170 year-VERY old Vampire man on the loose, watch out ladies ⬆️". I handed the piece of cloth to Damon. It was funny watching the numerous amounts of feelings flooding through this man. After reading it, Damon looked directly to me. He growled, tearing the cloth into a million pieces in the process, "Freaking Lockwood and Donovan". I have never in my life found the joy of witnessing Damon merely pissed off at two teenage boys until now. He was about to storm off before I grabbed a hold of his hand. "Damon, they're just kids who are having fun.", I light-heartedly argued, still muffling a few giggles that were left. He looked at me all serious, "So? These kids need to be taught a very valuable lesson". I scoffed, "Okay, so you would rather ditch an amazingly beautiful woman? Whom of that you've been trying to ask out on a date and- more importantly- literally begging have sex with, to punish some teenagers because of some harmless joke?". I folded my arms, waiting for his response. Damon was taken aback, but regrouped himself within the instant nonetheless. "Are you trying to get me off the dating market, Y/n L/n?", he smugly implied, making me seem like the desperate one. "Not anymore, you spent the available time flirting. Damon, a woman can handle so much flirting before she gives up on the potential of a new and intimate relationship.", I gestured mockingly. For the rest of the day, Damon had been sneaking in flirtatious comments, but never succeeded in having sex with me when night came.

That was the first time I realized I had strong and the realest of feelings for Damon Salvatore. It was the little moments with him, they were the absolute best and always will be. These past few weeks have gone by and I haven't seen him at all since I asked for him to turn his feelings off...

"Okay- on the count of ONE, TWO, THREE!", Jenna yelled, before consuming larges amounts of beer from what was called a "beer bong". We were at a college dorm party, a friend of her's knew the people that lived in this dorm. As her college friend, I had to join in on the fun. I took the tube into my mouth, soon feeling the cold carbonated liquor travel down my throat. I became the life of the party that day. Scratch that- JENNA and I, became the life of the party. Especially after consuming the beer, she went onto one of the tables and started sensually dancing while keeping the crowd entertained. After her little attempt at being on the table, she stepped the wrong way and fell off the table. I was the one to catch her, following loud roars of cheering as we continued partying the night away.

This was just one of my many favorite moments with Jenna. Jenna taught me that with all the stress that comes, sometimes partying helps relieve the thoughts. Now all I see is her wrongful death and the frozen look of fear on her gray and black-veined face and it's all because of me...

"Do you remember when you first asked me about Stefan?", Elena asked me. I looked intently towards her, "What made it come to mind?". She softly chuckled, "The day after you had asked me about him, I met him in the cemetery right when school ended for the day". My face had lightened with curiosity. She continued, "Never would I have thought my life would so drastically change after meeting him... for better or for worse, that I don't know yet haha". She leaned in to hug me, "Thank you, Y/n... thank you so much for bringing Stefan, my sweet loving boyfriend, into my life". I hugged her back, feeling happier than ever to bring her joy especially after her long period of suffering.

Elena was the first young girl I met who was ever so loyal, compassionate, -annoyingly self-involved at times, and empathetic to those closest to her. All that is left of Elena now is her sacrifice towards her failed attempt to rescue Jenna from this horrible mess. It was all my fault, bringing this burden of the world of vampires, werewolves, and witches. She would've had a fulfilling life if it wasn't for my debt owed to Katerina Petrova...
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As I was about to stake myself in the heart, Stefan had roughly kicked the stick away from my firm grasp. "WHAT THE HELL STEFAN?!", I miserably cried out loud. My arms were weak and burrowed themselves against my stomach while I sobbed uncontrollably. I felt Stefan yank me from the ground, so that I was standing on my own two feet. My mind was still in a daze when Stefan tried to focus my attention on him. That lasted for the next 10 minutes, feeling like the worst person in the world. I finally heard his voice, he loudly pointed out, "You're not going to die today, Y/n. None of this was your fault- listen to me , please, Y/n". My aching eyes looked at his worried face.
It hurt so much with this pain that unnecessarily kept going. "I need to turn it off at least, Stefan- It just hurts too much for me to consciously bear!", I whimpered. He pulled me in to a tight hug. "Look, I know things are really bad right now. But please hold onto your humanity, trust me. I can't stand losing another person I know and love- whether that would be literal or emotional loss.", he painfully begged me. "Please just give me the stake back, Stefan. PLEASE LET ME DIE DAMMIT, STEFAN!", I choked, pushing Stefan more than a few feet away from me and making a run for the stick... that was until I froze up hearing Damon's voice..."Well brother, it looks like my turn has just begun. Let the pro show you how it's done."