One of the Guys

Heavy Thinking

We sat at the island in the kitchen silently. I gently rubbed Logan's back as he sobbed lightly. Neither one of us made an effort to start a conversation and I know he's grateful for that. I've only witnessed Logan cry twice, now three times, and he never wants to talk about what happened.

Even if I did try and talk to him he wouldn't answer.

After a few minutes he composed himself and rested his head on my shoulder. He sighed heavily. "I'm Sorry." He whispered. "I'm Sorry for everything. I never wanted to break our friendship apart."

"Then why did you?" I asked.

"I thought that Marissa was more important than anything. I was such a love-sick puppy that I left you. I listened to everything she said. I believed everything she said. I told her I loved her for God sakes! I even messed up our friendship. I never wanted to. I love you. You're my best friend and she broke that. I realized that I should've put you first and not her. Then to make it worse I told her I was breaking up with her and she blackmailed me so I can't get out of it. I'm so stupid." He cried. I hugged him and tangled my fingers in his hair.

"I'm just so Sorry." He sobbed. "Logan, I understand but it was your decision. I do forgive you but that doesn't mean I'm not going to forget this. You were really stupid to leave your best friend for a fake broad like her. I'll deal with the chick for you later. I really can't stand her."

He looked up and smiled. "Best friends?" He asked. "Best friends."

I sighed and he moved his head back on my shoulder. I rested my head on his and were stayed silent for a while. "I missed you." He whispered. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." He paused and looked up at me. "You know, you are one amazing girl, Bubbs." I smiled.

"Thanks."

"I'm serious. You've always been there for me. You've helped me in many ways. You're smart.  You're talented. You're beautiful. You're just... Amazing. I guess what I'm trying to say is-"

Logan was cut off by my phone. U looked write the ID.

Matty.

"Hello?" I answered. I looked at Logan and gave him an apologetic smile. "Hey babe. I was wondering if you wanted to go to a party with me tonight? I know we just went out today but Yeah.." I thought about it for a second.

"I'm not really in the mood for a party right now. Maybe the next one, Yeah?"

"Yeah. Well, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye." I said and hung up.

"Who was that?" Logan asked, shoving a cookie in his mouth. "Matthew." He nodded.

"You and him are close, huh?" He asked, cookie pieces falling out his mouth. "Ew! Logan! Swallow before you chew! And Yes! He is my boyfriend After all." He looked at me confused. Surprised, and confused.

†††

"Wait! No! Stop it!" I laughed. "Tell me where it is and I'll stop tickling  you!" I gasped for air as he pinched my sides.

"I'm not.... Telling... You." I said through laughs.

"Come on! Tell me where your stash of food is!! I desperately need some!!" He whined. I shook my head and he pinched my sides again, making me laugh hysterically.

I eventually gave up and showed him where I kept my stash. "YESSSS!" He screamed as he raided my cupboard. I rolled my eyes but grabbed stuff for myself.

After I grabbed an arm full of food I joined Logan on the couch and grabbed the remote from him. I put on Criminal Minds and he whined.

"You know I love this show... You also know I can't watch it at night either." I simply chuckled and continued to watch my favorite show, munching on some hot Cheetos.

"I want some hot Cheetos." He said, pinching his fingers together. I swatted his hands away. "Mine!" I said, shoveling more Cheetos in my mouth. I smiled and turned my attention back at the TV.

I licked my lips as I finished off my chips and cookies.

I felt Logan's hand touch the corner of my mouth and wipe something off. "You have crumbs all around your mouth." He chuckled, tracing his thumb against my bottom lip. Ho's chuckle turned into a smile as he stared at my bottom lip, slowly moving his hand away.

He sighed and looked away. I looked at him with curiosity.  "Look, Bubbs,  I've been meaning to tell you this. Look.. I... Gosh this is harder than o thought. Look, I like you. Okay?" I sighed. I knew this already, but I just don't know how to tell him..

"Logan... I'm in a relationship right now. I just.." I trailed off and he nodded.

"I'm going to bed. It's been a long night." I said walking up the stairs. "You coming?" He nodded and followed me up the stairs.

He pushed me out of the way and flopped on my bed, covering his face with my pillow and grunting. "Move over!" I whined, pushing his foot over, only leaving me enough space to sit down. He rolled over and groaned. "Fine." He mumbled.

He rolled to one side. "Logan.. Logan! You're gonna fall." Instead of listening he continued to roll until he rolled his way off the bed with a "thump."

"Owe." He whimpered as he stared at the ceiling. "I told you not to fall."

"But it was fun! I think I broke that bone that everyone has in their butt though." I rolled my eyes. "It's called a tail bone. Now, I'm going to bed. Are you going to lay down there?" I asked. He shrugged. "I'm gonna just sleep down here."

"Okay." I said, tossing him a pillow and blanket. "Night Bubbs."

"Night." I mumbled. I flicked off the light and stared at the dark ceiling. I sighed.

What do I do now?

Logan confessed his feelings.. finally.. I'm dating Matthew.. I've changed some of my boyish ways.. clothing wise..

This is all just a big mess..

So should it stay like this?

Do I wanna keep those changes? Or do I change everything even more?