First Marriage, Second Love.

10. In A Dilemma.

"I didn't know it was that tough to choose a hospital to work at." I say.

"It is. I don't need money, but I do need to work in a place where I would learn new things every day." She says.

"Then maybe you should select a hospital which calls out to you more. I mean, you have options and you know what you want. The only thing you have to do is look back and think which hospital's vibe felt right or where your heart really wants to work." I say.

"So instead of my smart brain, I should listen to my non-talking heart?" She asks with a chuckle.

"Well, isn't the heart connected to the brain and gives it signals?" I ask with a raised brow.

"Good one." She says, "But for now, let's focus on this. Do you like this ring?"

I look at the simple silver ring and nod. "That is good for me."

"Now about my ring. I like these three. You can choose any of them." She says, putting aside three options.

"Okay. Is this some trick question?" I ask.

"No. Actually... One sec." She says as her phone rings. She frowns when she sees who it is then says, "I am sorry. I have to take this. Please excuse me."

"Sure." I say and she goes out to talk, "Must be important. Now, which one out of these three?"

***Saira's POV.***

"Hi, Leah. How are you?" I ask as soon as I pick up the call. It is rare she ever calls me.

"I am good. What about you?" She asks.

"Same here." I say gingerly.

"Good. By the way, I wanted to ask you something." She says and from her voice I can feel the tension.

"Before that, I have to say something to you. Guess what? I am getting married." I say excitedly.

"What? I mean... Oh my gosh! Really?" She asks.

"Yes." I say, sighing internally with relief that I successfully distracted her.

"Congratulations. But this soon, how?" She asks.

"Arranged marriage." I say.

"Really? In this day and age?" She asks.

"It is still quite common." I say.

"So, do you both like each other?" She asks, and sounds a little doubtful.

"Of course. Why would we say yes if not?" I ask.

"Then why did you ask Akash out?" She asks, and I put my hand on the phone and groan.

I clear my throat and say, "Because I knew him for the longest time and thought to date him. But I swear I didn't know he was going out with you. Do you really think I would approach the man who is already taken? Like come on, you know me better."

"So you don't like him that way?" She asks.

I sigh heavily and say, "To be honest, at some point I did, but I have moved on, Leah, and you don't need to worry about anything. Akash loves you, right? So why ask these questions?"

"You are right. I am sorry to spoil your mood. Send me pics of your ring." She says.

"Sure. I will also send invitations. Please do ‌come." I say.

"I will." She says, and we hung up.

I get inside and see Parth has already chosen a ring for me, so I ask, "Which one did you choose?"

"Have some patience. You will see it in the evening." He says.

"Okay." I say.

"Anything serious?" He asks, eyeing my phone.

"No. Just a colleague." I say.

After that we parted ways as both of us had to shop for different stuff. Saina was sad to know that, but Neel's gift made her comply. Even I wanted to spend some time with Parth too, so I can get to know him better before our wedding, but it looks like we won't have time for that.

Later in the evening during the ring ceremony, I was happy with his choice of ring because I didn't think he would think I would like this type of ring. It was a rose gold double band with a fire opal gem of an oval shape and small diamonds surrounding it. It is light and beautiful, just like I wanted.

Even during the engagement, we got little time together as our family kept us busy, introducing us to each other's relatives, business colleagues, and friends. But he seemed polite to everyone and mindful of me.

Things turned tiring after I got a call from Akash as soon as I came home. I had just gotten changed and was about to crash when it rang. I didn't see who it was and just picked it up and said hi.

"Hi. How are you?" Akash asks, and I sit up in shock.

"Akash?" I ask and look at the phone just to be sure, then ask, "What happened?"

"Why? Can't I call you with no emergencies like Leah?" He asks.

"You can but..." I say, but stop.

"But what?" He asks.

"Nothing. I am fine. How are you?" I ask.

"I am good too. I heard from Leah that you are getting married." He says.

"Yes." I say.

"Why didn't I hear it from you? Are we not friends?" He asks.

"Woah! When did we become friends?" I ask.

"I hope you are kidding." He says.

"I am. It happened quickly, so it took me time to process. The invitations will be sent out soon." I say.

"Congratulations!" He says.

"Thanks." I say then there is a silence for a few seconds, "Akash, why did you call me?"

"I... I just wanted to..." He hesitates.

"You what?" I ask, holding my breath.

"I just wanted you to know that I am happy for you. It feels nice to know you have someone, too." He says and I fist the bedsheets.

"Does it make you feel less guilty somehow?" I ask grimly.

"Well, a little, I guess." He says.

"Actually, I am tired, Akash. I just got back from my engagement party and tomorrow I have another ceremony to prepare for. So, I need to go to sleep now. Please come to the wedding with Leah. It will make me very happy." I say and go to hang up when he stops me.

"Hey, Saira!" He says.

I take a deep breath and say, "Yes?"

"I hope we both find happiness in our decision." He says solemnly and I feel like a jerk and confused a bit too.

"I for sure will." I say confidently and hang up.

I hate the feeling I get after I hung up on him. Akash and Leah have to call me out of the blue like this and that too when my marriage is fixed. Leah was fine, but the way Akash was talking, it felt like he wanted to say something but couldn't. This has thrown me into a dilemma about my decision to marry Parth.

"This is wrong, Saira. You are engaged now, and that means a commitment, and you are not the type of person who would ditch her responsibilities. And Parth is a really nice guy. So what if you are not in love with him, but you are also not in love with Akash, too. Because love is the subject that you skipped past to achieve your dreams. But that doesn't mean you can't ace it now. After we are married, I will try my best to fall for Parth. I mean, how difficult it can be. Right?" I ask myself.

Little did I know that falling in love is neither easy nor hard, only a stupidity. And once you fall, it is a maze with walls of varied emotions from which you can never get out of.