Innocent Lust

History

Marcus is the first to speak, "I think we should take over all the mafias. Show them who's boss!"

I laugh a little.

"No." Sage says flatly.

Nat:

It baffles me that after everything Sage has done for us he still thinks we will leave him if we get the chance. Or ever.

He saved Beck from either death or being sold. He saved me. His girlfriend saved Marcus and Carmelo without knowing it. She also saved Emerson.

Every time Sage offers to raise our paycheck we all know it's because he wants us to buy ourselves a life we want. But this is the life we want. We have a put together little happy family. There's nothing more any of us could ask for. It's more than any of us have outside of this room.

I have never asked Sage for much. Never told him what to do. But this one time I have to ask.

"I have an idea," I stand up and pull myself as together as possible, "We can free as the girls and women being sold and held captive."

Sage stares at me with a blank expression for half a second. Something no one else would notice. Marcus and Carmelo both shift at the same time. Both uncomfortable. The movement gives away that they both at some point in time had some contact with a trade.

Sage smiles, "I like that idea. Anyone else?"

No one says anything else.

"Okay, now onto the business," Sage sighs.

He has been away but he still knows that the business has been struggling.

Marcus stands up, "Basically your entire company board quit. Carmelo and I have been doing our best to run it. We have been slowly getting our stocks back up."

"Do you think you will be able to get it back to the way it was before? Our net worth and all?" Sage asks.

A look of sympathy crosses Marcus's eyes. I look at everyone but I am the only one who read it.

I quickly notice Baylors behavior. Marcus and Sage continue to talk about the business and Carmelo chips in.

Baylor quietly sits and observes. She isn't really listening though. I can see the glazed over look her eyes are giving. She had huge bags under her eyes despite Sage being fully back and okay. Baylor looks over at Emerson every now and then before zoning out again.

I watch her twitch. Her knee bounces up and down rapidly. Her fingertips tap against the armrest on the chair. Her chest heaves in and out. It's all silent. I watch her sit there, silently having a breakdown. Silently freaking out. Silently dying on the inside.

Sometimes I wish I wasn't so good at reading people. I wish I wasn't able to tell what they are thinking or feeling. I can't always help them. I can only feel bad for them.

Without looking at Baylor, sensing her as if she and him are one, Sage places his hand on her bouncing knee. He rubs his thumb slowly back and forth beneath the table. Baylor instantly starts to calm down. A tears slips down her cheek and she looks around to see if anyone noticed. I look away when her eyes reach mine so she doesn't know that I saw.

I look over at Beck now. He saw the same interaction I saw. But instead of analyzing it he loathed it. He loathes to be touched in a gentle loving way. To have someone to protect. Someone who makes him happy. He wants to fall in love but he also doesn't want to risk bringing them into this life. This like full of never ending mafias.

As good as I am at analyzing other peoples body language and emotions, I can't understand my own. I don't know myself of what I want. That's what I am jealous of: Everyone who understands themself.

I blink a couple times and bring myself back into the conversation.

Sage:

I leave my hand resting on Baylors leg. I gently remind her that I am here, with her, and we are both okay. I want so badly to kiss away the tear soaked cheek.

When we finish discussing the business we move into the last topic.

I stand up, "Lastly, the old guy. What was his name?"

"Rodrigo Alvarez," Natalia says the name like it's a circus act.

"What do we know?"

"He claims to have a right to lead the Russians. He wants us to help him get his power back. We fact checked him and it all seems accurate," Natalia shrugs.

It seems so set up, "What should we do?"

"I think we should visit the Russians. Take a peek around," Natalia has a mischievous glint in her eyes.