Lost

Chapter 11 ~ ☾☀

After about ten or so minutes, Sebastian finally meets me on the porch.

"Ready to go," he asks.

I reply, "Yep... Are you gonna put on some sunscreen before we go?"

He grins at me as says, "Nope, sunblock is for the weak. The sun is magical with her energizing rays. Why would you wanna block that?"

"Whatever, it's your burnt skin you'll have to live with," I say rolling my eyes.

We begin our walk down to the beach. It's about five minutes away by foot, so we have time, but instead of making me spills my guts out now, Sebby lets me think about what I'm going to tell him, as we walk in silence. Occasionally, he'd "accidentally" bump into me and nearly knock me off the trail, but other than that, it was a quiet walk.

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Once we made it to the beach, we found a place to set up camp for the day. As I thought, Sebastian forgot to bring anything with him, so I give him the towel I brought for him.

After about two minutes of laying our towels down in the perfect spot, Sebby suggests we walk over to the water, and so, I follow. The cool water feels amazing on my feet on this hot day, but for some reason, I don't mind the sun beating down on me– in fact, it's almost empowering...

"So, tell me, princess. What's been going on with you?" Sebby asks.

I knew it was coming, but that didn't stop it from ruining my day any less. Everything about Adein just dampens my mood right now. I know I shouldn't avoid my feelings, or lack thereof, but sometimes it's easier than facing the truth. I don't have to face anything until he gets back, which isn't for another month and a half, so why did Sebby have to make me?

I know, I know, he's just trying to keep me from bottling everything up, and I really appreciate that, but sometimes I'd just like to spend the day at the beach with my brother without all of the drama. But oh well...

I start to tell Sebastian everything that's happened, beginning with Adein and then going into the weird events. I tell him how something feels broken between me and Adein, how I thought that maybe if he told me he loves me that it would fix it, but he didn't... and to top it all off, I'm not sure if I even love him. Then I tell him about the weird things I've been seeing, how Rosalin was acting weird over some creep in a van, and Liam and mum were overreacting to what I saw. I tell him how I'm scared that I might be going crazy because of everything, and that I just don't know how to handle it all. And I'm so scared of life right now that I don't know what to do...

Once I'm finished rambling about my problems, Sebby pulls me into the biggest hug before I can start crying in front of everyone on the beach.

"I'm sorry, princess..." was all he said, and for some reason, it made me feel better. Standing here in my brother's embrace, with the cool water washing up and down my feet, my toes sinking in the sand, and the gorgeous sun pouring its rays on us, I felt ok. As I melted into his stomach, melted into his being, all my problems seemed to disappear. He made me feel like everything was going to be ok. He's always done that– since I was a little kid, Sebby's always been there when I needed him. I remember one time, when I was still learning to ride my first bike, I fell and skinned my knee really bad. I was crying so hard, and Sebby came and picked me up. He told me that all brave warriors get wounds, and even when life makes us hurt, it's ok because it won't hurt forever. He bandaged my knee, and I felt better. I got back up on my bike, and even though I kept falling for a while, I never gave up until I did it successfully...

That's how he made me feel when he hugged me– he made me feel as if even though everything might be a mess right now, it's going to get better, and that little bit of hope is what keeps me going...

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Sebby and I walked back to our spot on the beach, and he let me lie down for a little bit before speaking.

"Ser... what if what you saw was real?" he asked with hesitation. I couldn't tell if he was wiping off sweat or the stray hairs from his face, but something seemed to bothering him more than what was on his face...

"What do you mean," I ask.

"I mean, what if the things you thought you saw weren't just your imagination... what if they were real."

I guess I'd never really thought about if they were real. Everyone kept telling me they weren't, and so I started to believe it so. But what if they were real, I don't know, so I shrugged. As I did, I tilted my head in confusion as I looked up at him, wondering where he's going with this...

"Ser, I have something I need to tell you..."