Dispatches from a Teenage Girl

Chapter 13

Grace and Claire come over to my house to get ready. My mom is out at a movie with her girlfriends so we don't have to answer a lot of questions. Thank god! Between the two of us, me anxious about my friends meeting and liking Sam, and Sam liking them, and Grace preparing for a date that she isn't even sure is a date, we are a bucket of nerves. In fact, Grace is a total wreck. I think she brought her entire wardrobe to try on and she's currently just trying on my clothes anyway. I am going to continue to try my look at cool, casual and comfy.

I doubt Grace is going to find a single thing to wear that is to her satisfaction. I am not sure I've ever seen her so wound up.

"Lady, chill out," Claire says. "Just wear the cute jeans you have on and a black top. Simple, sexy and you'll still look like yourself. Plus I think Lucy will kill us if we look like we're trying too hard."

"That is true," I say while also throwing a pillow at Claire. Claire is wearing an adorable stripped romper that is just perfect on her, effortlessly cool. It makes me hate her a tiny bit.

Grace grabs a plain black t-shirt with a large scoop neck. She pulls it over her head and, honestly, she looks great. Her face doesn't show it though. She still looks so anxious.

Claire turns the music up and starts dancing, grabs Grace's hands and tries to loosen her up. While looking unimpressed, eventually, a smile does cross Grace's face.

"I am so nervous!" she finally screams.

"Um, no kidding," Claire says flatly. We all laugh. Tonight is going to be fun!

Finally, I settle on some black jeans and a loose white tank top with a single ocean wave on it, drawn in black. I love this shirt. It reminds me of this city. On the ocean but also so bland. It doesn't have the easy, breezy ocean city vibe – feels more like a city that could exist anywhere that happens to be on the ocean. We really take it for granted.

"Ok, so do we know for sure if Mr. Nouveau is coming?" I ask Grace.

"Oh god, I hope he does!" she answers. "I haven't talked to him since I gave him the flyer. But I swear there was a moment. We totally had a moment. I am cautiously optimistic."

Good enough for me. We all have our chosen outfits on, we've danced out a tiny bit of our nerves, it's time to get this night started. "Let's get going!"

We head downstairs and out the door. We've managed to sneak a few fake IDs that seem to circulate around school. You'd think the bouncers in this town would know the names and pictures by now since I'm sure at least four other girls use these same ones. My hope is that we don't get carded like the last time I was there. If we act effortlessly cool enough, I think we can pull it off.

You can smell the ocean breeze in the air tonight. That happens sometimes when the air is still. The salty smell just sits on the city and everywhere smells like the beach. I take a deep breath. I love it.

"It stinks!" says Claire. Oh Claire.

I can finally see the bar about a block away. The Dominion Tavern. A little bit hole in the wall, a little bit amazing. There isn't anyone hanging outside so I guess we'll have to go in to find out if Sam is there yet and if Mr. Nouveau has decided to show up.

I stop Claire and Grace before we get too close. "Ok guys, the goal is to just walk in like it's nothing. We are over 21 so why would we look to the bouncer or show any doubt that we can just walk in, right? So we will just walk to the door together and then just walk right in. Sound good?"

Both girls nod but look super nervous.

"Ok, ladies, deep breaths," I give them each a look. "Stop looking nervous. We can do this."