Where The Sage Shrubs Grow,

Chapter 25

Sage's POV:
We were in the great hall for dinner, Clementine sitting by her self, me and Hallie also sitting by ourselves. Clementine didn't seem like she had a very big appetite seeing as there was no food in her plate, I hope not. She shouldn't have one after screwing up my life like this.

Fred kept shooting me sympathetic looks and angry ones at other Gryffindor students. They must've been making comments about me or something.

Hallie and I decided to leave dinner early. We got tired of the rude remarks and stares. I shot Fred a look trying to telepathically tell him where I was going, he gave me a nod and I exited the great hall. I could feel Clementine staring at us but if she had something to say she would have to come up to me and say it. I'm not going to her.

It was a very uneventful evening, I read, talked to Hallie, and went to sleep. The next morning wasn't much different, except I took a shower. Typically I take them at night so I have time to do something with my hair but today I just used magic to do two French braids. I headed down, ate breakfast, went to class. People seemed to be over talking crap about me after two days so now I just have to put up with glares.

One my class was over I met up with my group and we walked to the courtyard. The twins talked about a prank they had just pulled, Hallie talked about this new book she had started reading, and Karl talked about this new band he'd found.

I always enjoyed my time with them but this time my mind kept wandering to the group sitting a few yards away. I made sure to shoot Clementine a few cool glares. She looked right back at me until she seemed to be tired of us just looking at each other and she stood up.

I was worried she might be coming over to start another fight or to go on about how terrible my parents are. She seemed to be preparing herself by taking a few deep breaths. She calmly strode halfway over to us, cleared her throat and began "Sage, Hallie, I am s-sorry. I'm sorry I said all those things and for genuinely being a horrible person and an even worse friend."

Her little group, consisting of Hermione, Ron, Finn, and Harry all came up behind her. Like a defense system in case me or Hallie choose to attack. I won't lie, I was thinking about it. It would be pointless though.

I appreciated her deciding to do this in front of a lot of people but I've already resigned to not caring about other peoples' opinion on me. Hallie looked at me and shrugged, I could tell she had been waiting for an apology but for me that wasn't going to automatically fix things.

" I forgive you Clementine." Hallie acknowledged stepping forward and wrapping her in a hug. I however decided to stay where I was. Clementine looked over at me, obviously wanting me to forgive her, I wanted to. But I'm not ready to trust her.

"Sage?" She asked
I let out a small sigh and looked down at my feet "I appreciate you apologizing, truly I do. I forgive you, but I can't trust you. Not yet and probably not for a while."

Clementine was obviously disappointed by my answer but she just nodded at my response and we shared our first hug since this little incident. It was nice to have my whole friend group back after feeling like a total outcast. Which I am, but at least I have friends who don't think of me that way.

It still felt strange though, everyone seemed to just accept her back and just trust her completely. I felt like the jerk for being skeptical, maybe it's cause I was the one most affected, maybe none else has to worry about their secrets being shared.

I decided to go on a walk to clear my head and think about my own personal issues. Am I in the wrong for not trusting her? Am I just paranoid? I found a random staircase grown over with ferns and plants, I decided to sit there and lay my head in my arms. The cool breeze and distant chatter of students calmed me down a bit but I still felt overwhelmed with my own thoughts.

Someone must've felt my nervous energy radiating from the stairs cause I felt a tap on my shoulder, causing me to flinch, gasp and press a hand to my chest.
Fred raised his hands in a show a peace "sorry, I didn't mean to scare you"
He cleared some of the snow from the stair and sat down beside me. I looked at him curiously, I wanted to know why he was here.
Once he had adjusted he let out a deep sigh and looked at me with his intense brown eyes.
"So, tell me what's wrong.

My eyes widened at his simple statement. How did he even know something was wrong?
"Nothing?" I replied
"Cmon Sage I can tell something is bothering you. I won't tell anyone if that's what you're worried about." He insisted

At this point I didn't really care who I told. I just wanted someone to listen to my anxieties and tell me that I'm not crazy "I just- I feel like a jerk cause I don't trust Clementine and everyone else does. I feel like everyone has reverted back to normal with her but I haven't because she ruined my life for a whole 24 hours. Now people think I'm an evil bitch but I feel like if I express that I don't trust her then that's exactly what I'll be. But how can I be expected to trust her like I did after I shared something with her that I didn't want anyone to know and she literally used it against me in a petty argument. Blabbing it to everyone in the school in the process as well I might add."

Fred looked at me with kind understanding eyes leaning back on his elbows "I know I don't understand what your going through with your parents but I don't trust her either. You aren't crazy, when someone betrays your trust like that, you can't be expected to trust them."

Fred understood it, he understood me too. Almost as well as Hallie, which is saying something. I decided to scoot over and lean my head on his shoulder.

If I'm being honest I wanted to ask him to hold me, but not just hold me. I mean really hold me. The way he would hold me when he felt I really needed it, where all I could hear is his heart beating in rhythm with mine. Where the only thing I could smell was vanilla, cinnamon, fireworks, and pine trees. When the only thing that mattered was if I was ok and if I felt safe.

But asking that would make me seem needy and would probably give away my real feelings. Honestly, I need to stop catching feelings for the guys that are way out of my league.
"I'll always be here for you Sage, you know that right?" He asked

"Yeah, I know."

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