Above the Sea of Fog (Provincia de Marina Series #3)

Kabanata 30

Kabanata 30

Above the Sea of Fog

The encounter with Wyatt was something that I don't want to experience again. However, it seems that destiny has its way of playing with us. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang pinakain ni Wyatt kay Saab at palagi niyang hinahanap-hanap si "Mr. Nice Man". I kept on reminding her that his name was Wyatt pero mukhang ayaw niyang tanggapin.

I even told Linda to distract Saab from going to the park. Kung palagi siya roon, baka masanay siyang hinahanap si Wyatt kahit hindi naman namin kaano-ano iyon.

But technically...I am related to him.

"Mama, can we invite Mr. Wyatt for dinner on Christmas Eve?" Saab asked while we were in the middle of our meal. Halos masamid ako sa sariling kinakain dahil sa pagbanggit niya lang sa pangalan ni Wyatt.

I drank the glass of water in front of me. Sumilip ako kay Saab at nakitang seryoso nga ang kaniyang pagtatanong. Her eyes were hopeful.

"Baby, Mr. Wyatt might be busy. He's a businessman and you see, businessmen don't always have free time."

"But it's dinner, Mama! Do they work during Christmas?"

"Well, no, but he is a busy man. We can't just ask for Mr. Wyatt's time. He's not even our friend, Saab."

"But I am friends with him!" she argued like she's a grown-up kid. Napatingin lamang ako sa kaniya at humihiling ako na sana itigil niya na itong pag-iisip kay Mr. Wyatt. Kasi kapag binabanggit niya ang pangalan, ako naman itong hindi makatulog sa mga iniisip.

Wyatt's been on my mind lately...now that I've seen him in person after 5 years. Kung hindi ba naman ulit-ulitin ni Saab, malamang ay hindi ko rin naman iisipin. More so, I don't want to think that we stand a chance at lalong ayaw kong magtanong pa si Wyatt kung bakit hindi man lang ako nagpaalam.

I was thankful that he didn't ask me that question while we had our dinner. Kung may isasagot man ako, kasinungalingan lang din. Ayaw kong mahuli niya ang kasinungalingan ko. If he asks too much question, I'll probably melt down and tell him everything. Ayaw kong sirain ang magandang relasyon nila ng kaniyang Lolo and I don't want him go hate his Abuelo just because of the latter's actions in the past.

Kaya walang nanaig na katotohanan kasi pinatahimik ng Don si Mama. Kaya hindi ako naging Balsameda ay dahil pinagtabuyan kami. I am just going to be a dirt to their name if that happens, kasi anak ako ng babaeng pumatol sa matanda na. My mother fell in love with an old man but in the end, she was the only one who suffered. Siya lang din ang kinutya at kinawawa ng tao. Kaya pala diring-diri ang mga nanay noon sa akin sa tuwing nakikipagkaibigan ako sa mga anak nila. Alam nila na anak ako ng kung sinong lalaki at pinagtabuyan ang mama ko dahil pera lang daw ang habol.

They didn't know it was the Don but the fact that my mother was cursed to live an awful life, sino ba namang ina ang hahayaan ang anak nila na makipagkaibigan sa akin?

Kapag nalaman ni Wyatt, baka mandiri lang din siya sa akin. He'll probably regret pursuing me and would even cursed me like what his grandfather did. Gusto ko mang balewalain ang ideyang iyon dahil kilala ko naman si Wyatt...may posibilidad pa rin na gano'n ang mangyari. Kapag binalot ka ng galit at pagsisisi, hindi mo na makikita ang magandang bagay na idinulot ng pangyayaring iyon. Itinatak ko sa isip kong mas mabuti na lang na kamuhian ako ni Wyatt dahil sa pag-alis kaysa naman kamuhian niya ako dahil magkapamilya kami.

And maybe I was selfish to hide the truth. Maybe I was selfish for just wanting to love him like this. Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi ko maalis ang bawal na pagmamahal na ito. Isa nga siguro akong hangal para maging preso ng pag-ibig.