THE HATE YOU GIVE (Kookjin)

Chapter 37

Jungkook jumped in front of the camera happily, and both Jin as well as Jimin, could clearly make out the fine line of tears trickling down down his cheeks.

"I wish I can bring him here so everybody would see, I'm so happy to be a father right now. I know I said I wasn't ready, but I take that back, I take it all back, I'm so happy to have a son"

Jimin had tried so earnestly to stay strong for his friend, but he didn't know when he too broke down in tears, sobbing painfully into his knees.

As both men were gasping for much needed air, the next video played. However this time, the content wasn't the same. Instead this time, Jungkook had the video camera in his hand, looking down at his peacefully sleeping son in his crib.

"Hey I'm Jeon Minho" Jungkook whispers, trying to mimic the voice of a baby, while filming his son from every angle possible.

Switching the camera to his face, Jungkook had a bright smile playing on his lips. "Isn't he so handsome like his dad?" He asked and chuckled, "Maybe he did take some of his appa's features, but I can swear mine was more. Jin is sleeping right now, so this was the only chance I got to make this. I can't wait to see my son grow up into such a strong man, but at the same time, I hope he grows up to become nothing like me"

The next video was more heart wrenching than the previous, but Jin wanted to hear and see everything. He sure deserved to know that much.

The next video was of Jungkook again, this time, he sat on the same chair, but with a drink in his hand. He was wearing a black well tailored suit, paired with a matching black inner. His eyes looked red, heavy lidded and swollen.

"I, I, i think I killed my son" his voice broken in bits, as another tear slipped through the corners of his eyes. "He wouldn't wake up, he's just laying there with his eyes closed. Normally when I get close to him, his eyes would sparkly brightly, and he would look at me with his big round eyes as he giggled. But, Minho wouldn't do any of that, he's just so pale and cold"

Arrrggh! Jungkook yelled out in pain, throwing the bottle of drink he had in his hand into a nearby wall. The shattering pieces of glass filled the air, before Jungkook's breathless pants for air followed right after. And behind those, were his shaky sobs as he fell to his knees. "I swear, I thought I called Maria, I had him and the next I didn't, did I just kill my child?" He wailed, uncontrollably this time.

"Oh my God!" Jimin wails right after, chest feeling congested with pain and anguish.

Looking to Seokjin, the man looked almost lifeless. His tears had since dried up, he had his lips slightly parted, allowing small and broken gasps to escape easily.

The last video eventually starts playing, and it showed Jungkook with his hair shaved off, having almost no readable expression on his face. "Today, I Jeon Jungkook visited my kids" his voice sounded extremely low and weak, "Apparently I did not only kill Minho, but I think I also killed my daughter whom I never got to met"

He scoffed like a crazed man, over and over.

"I'm so weak, I'm tired of being alive, I can't swim because I never learned as a child, I should probably just go drown myself. I've caused so much pain and agony to people who have done nothing but love me, and I can never redeem myself nor pay for any of my sins. I cannot possibly face Jin, because now my health has worsened. I no longer have an excuse, everything was me, it was all me, and I realized it a little too late. Nobody deserved what happened to them, i was the one who solely ruined everyones life"

Jungkook exhaled deeply, his lashes wet with tears, "I should just leave now, this is the last video I'm making. I hope someone finds it, and at the same time I hope no one does as well"

Jungkook sat quiet for a while, resting his head back against the chair, while starring at the ceiling, completely lost and absentminded.

After a while, he picks himself up from the chair and left the room, without bothering to turn off the video camera like he always did after each session.

Jin and Jimin waited and waited, but no other video played after that.

Jin resumed crying, even worse than before, he continuously hit a fist over his chest to ease the pain. It was too much, everything was way too much to handle.

"Let's go," Jin says breathlessly, desperately trying to stand on his wobbly legs.

Jimin assisted him up, after wiping his own tears, "Where? where are we going?" He asked while sniffing.

"Where else but to find Jungkook goddam it Jimin!" Jin yelled, "Jungkook can't swim Jimin, who knows what he has done to himself?" He says, as more waves of tears poured from his eyes.

Jimin instantly nodded, he had no choice but to, because Jin was going through a while lot right now, and he was really against trying to anger him any further.

They both stood up and headed straight for the door, with Jin practically running ahead of Jimin.

But there was one problem, nobody knew the whereabouts of Jungkook.