His Man | Taekook ☑

Chapter 66: Jungkook

That maniac was busy kissing , licking and biting me everywhere and it made me want to kill myself. I was disgusted of me. Not him as much as I was disgusted of me. I felt worthless. A mere commodity you could tie up and use as you please. I wondered why I find myself in situations like these when that is not what I deserve. I took several deep breaths to calm myself as he ripped my shirt off. I couldn't cry. There was no way I would cry. Not in front of that man. I had to keep my eyes shut and I did.

I thought about that another time when I felt helpless just like I did then. When I told Tae that I was going to quit Solar Inc, I was upset. I loved that job but I couldn't make him sign a contract that could be used against him later even though he was ready to sign it. After I resigned Solar Inc, I had nothing. I couldn't go back to KC and spend my life being the guy who got lucky just because he is Kim Taehyung's boyfriend. No other company would hire me for the same reason that I was his boyfriend. My career was finished for no fault of my own. All I did was fall in love and it was over. It was like I couldn't have a life of my own anymore. All I was to people was Kim Taehyung's boy. What about the Jungkook who is smarter than all the people in KC's IT department combined? What about the Jungkook who flooded his home with national and international medals? What about the Jungkook who studied in the college meant for top 0.1% students and emerged as a topper even there? What about the Jungkook who was a black belt in taekwondo and an national level boxer? What about the Jungkook who designs softwares for fun when others can't do the same thing in years? I was so so many things and yet it didn't matter. Despite everything, I was still jobless and I was still chained up to a bed waiting to be raped. All because I fell in love and it seems I lost my identity. I would always remain Taehyung's boyfriend despite everything else that I am.

When I had confided in Tae about all of this, he took me in his arms. He comforted me, made me sit on the bed while he kneeled in front of me, my hands held tight in his.

He told me how he knew the second he first saw my resume at KC that I wouldn't last long in the company. When I asked him why, he told me he thought I was too big for a trivial job. I remember chuckling at what he had said. My job at KC was the one people would kill and die for. "You are not meant for small jobs that serve other people, baby", he had said. "You are meant for great things. You have the ability to build something of your own. Something bigger than even me and KC. All you have to do is stop crying and start believing in yourself. How are you supposed to make things happen that you can't even dare to imagine could happen?". I wasn't fully convinced that night with what he said but I wasn't helpless anymore. I knew for a fact that I was never going to accept any financial help from Tae but I was reminded of what I was. He reminded me of my worth. He saved me that night. He made me believe, even though I felt hopeless then, I could indeed lean on myself and believe that I was able to make something work and that, eventually I wouldn't be a failure. I could and would build something for myself. And I knew that he would be with me in the thick and the thin. He would be by my side through everything, not as the CEO of KC but as the man I love.

I braced on to myself as Sooman played with my body, feeling helpless all over again. Could Tae do what he did for me that night, once again? Could he please get me out of my helplessness and make me believe that I deserved more than being treated like this? I didn't deserve this. I was praying to be saved one more time like I was saved that night by Tae. I couldn't handle his hands and lips on my skin, I was on the verge of breaking down. I forced my brain to drift again and it took me to my first time with Taehyung or my first time letting someone be on top of me. I remembered how he guided me to his black couch. How made sure again and again that I was comfortable. Your first time with someone isn't supposed to be in an office but I didn't mind at all. I wanted him so so bad. I wanted him bad enough to lie to him that the last time I had bottomed was 2 years ago when I hadn't. I didn't tell tell him that I had always been a top because I didn't want him to postpon that. I wanted him then.