Keeping Secrets

Library

PEYTON

I played that night over and over in my mind, several times a day, for the next few weeks. Beau had still been in my bed when I'd woken up the day after the concert. My head had been against his chest and his arm wrapped around my back. I'd been warm and comfortable and it had been the absolute best night of my life.

All we had done was kiss, but it had been spectacular. Beau knew what he was doing, that's for sure. I could tell from just that night that he could be soft and gentle, or more authoritative and bossy, and either was fine with me. I'd been completely content in his arms with his warm mouth on mine, and Beau had seemed to be as well. He hadn't pushed for anything more than that.

The sun had just risen when Beau had given me a gentle kiss goodbye and left me in bed to catch a cab back to the hotel. I was still there when Amanda showed up a couple of hours later, all buzzing from her night with Dane. She told me all about it while she picked at one of my boxes of cereal.

According to her, everything with Dane had been great. He'd been recognized on their way back to the hotel, and she'd found that very exciting. She'd stood next to him as he signed a couple of autographs and posed for a couple of pictures.

The thought of that much attention made me a bit uncomfortable, but Amanda seemed to love the fact that she'd been out with a famous drummer.

Dane was just so awesome. She smiled with her entire face as she explained just how strong and cool he was. They had slept together, and she was so ecstatic about it she gave me a few more details than I needed.

She wasn't as excited when I asked if she thought Justin would find out. Her eyes had narrowed, and she'd glared at me for a second before she shrugged it off and said she didn't care.

I was happy for her. She had thirsted after Dane ever since we met him in Justin's garage, and that dream had finally come true for her. But when she told me Dane had said he'd call her later that week, I began to worry. I hoped for her sake that he would, but I also wanted her to understand that it was most likely just something he said.

"So what happened with you and Beau?" she asked, almost like she'd forgotten, when it was time for her to leave. "Did you finally give up your v-card?"

"Um, nothing happened. We came back here because you were in his room. He slept on that side of the bed," I said and pointed to the left side, "and I slept right here."

"Really?" she asked and looked a little disappointed. "Nothing happened?"

For whatever reason, I couldn't even tell Amanda that he'd kissed me and made my stomach feel like it was full of butterflies.

I didn't tell anyone.

Amanda didn't hear from Dane that week, or anytime thereafter. At first she thought it was because they were busy getting ready for their tour, but as the days became weeks, she stopped with the excuses. I knew she was upset about it, and that it bothered her, even though she tried to play it off like it didn't matter.

I hadn't heard anything from Beau after that morning either. But I also hadn't expected to, so it wasn't like it was surprising. I'd hoped, of course.

Still did... sometimes.

When my phone buzzed on the table, I expected it to be Amanda. We were planning our Thanksgiving break, but it wasn't.

"Peyton," Becca hissed, louder than was appropriate for the library, and I realized I had zoned out. Again. I'd been doing a lot of that lately.

"What's going on?" Lin asked. Her normally soft voice had a bit of a concerned edge to it.

"Nothing really."