How to Love

If It'll Make Her Happy

Today has been the most eventful day ever! For me to have only worked a half day today I've been here for about 12 hours. It's actually kinda crazy to think about.

My niece was finally here. Little Avery was here and she is perfect. Holding her in my arms right now I know for sure that I would do anything for her.

She's so small with the fattest cheeks ever. I could tell that her hair was going to be super curly just like Austin's just with Casey's color. Right now she just looked like a baby, I can't tell who she looks like more.

I had her wrapped up in a warm blanket as I fed her. She was holding my pinky in her little hand as she looked up at me with curious eyes. I'm honestly in love.

"She's so beautiful" Austin said, standing over me. The look in his eyes as he's looking down at Avery says it all. He's also in love.

Casey is getting some well deserve sleep. She deserves it after being in labor for like 10+hours. I've devolved a new respect for her because of it. If I even get the flu I am out of it and she just went through more pain then I could imagine.The doctors had to help her to the bathroom and everything.

"She is" I said, smiling down at her. She's so precious.

"I have a daughter" he said for the 8th time since she's been here. He's really trying to come to terms with it.

"How many times are you going to say that?" I asked laughing at him.

"Till it feels real" he sighed. He reached down and held her little hand, a smile finding his lips. I know he's going to spoil the crap out of her.

"Do you want her?" I asked, taking the empty bottle out of her mouth. She was fast asleep but the side of her mouth was raising a little like she was smiling. Did I mention how cute she is??

"Yes, please" he said, reaching out for her.

I passed her to him very gentle to make sure we did it just as the doctors taught us.

Once in his arms her eyes opened and she cracked a small smile at him. He responded with a huge smile and walked over to the chair closer to Casey. I'm so happy for him.

I smiled over to them but my smile didn't last long. I could hear low sniffling coming from the other side of the room. Confused I turned around and the sight cut right into my heart.

Nyla was hugging her knees and rocking herself as she cried. God I felt horrible! I nearly forgot she was here, I was too focused on Avery.

She must hate being here right now. Her mama passed away in this very building not to far from this room.

I rushed over to her and went under her legs to pick her up. I sat her on my lap and started to kiss all on her face. I rubbed her arms because I could feel the goosebumps. She's really cold!

"I'm here, Nyla." I said, trying to warm her up.

"Please don't leave" she said, softly. I did kinda leave her for 2 hours to be with Avery. I'm really excited that she's here and I got lost in that happiness. I forgot that Nyla's mama just passed a few hours ago and that she's freshly grieving.

Nyla needs my comfort right now, Avery has her parents. I'll just visit her tomorrow but right now I need to get Nyla out of here. She's torturing herself just to be with me.

"Are you ready to go home?" I asked, rocking her in my arms.

"Yes please" she cried. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be selfish I just can't be here right now"

"I get it, you don't have to say sorry" I said, kissing the top of her head. She really don't have a reason to be sorry. She's grieving in the same place her mama passed away in.