I Miss You - McLennon AU

14.

7th September, 2021

College.

Day 2.

That Tuesday morning, Paul had woken up feeling rather refreshed. He and his brother had fell asleep on good terms, and with everything going on in his life, he had really needed for that to happen.

His first lesson wasn't until 10:30am that day, meaning that he didn't have to set off almost as soon as he woke up, and also that he could see Mike in the morning. He had gotten up at 8am, a little later than the previous morning, and headed downstairs, ready to make himself and Mike some breakfast.

"Good mornin'." Paul smiled, walking through the kitchen door. Mike was sat at the table, looking at his phone. He looked up when he saw Paul.

"Mornin'." Mike smiled back at Paul, before turning back down to his phone.

"You look happy today." Paul pointed out, heading over to the fridge. "Toast?"

"Yes please." The younger boy nodded. "Yeah... I just had a really nice evenin' last night."

With a smile, Paul nodded.

"Aye, same here." The teenager took the butter out from the fridge, before reaching into the bread box to grab some bread. "All ready for school?"

"Yeah." Mike smiled, putting his phone down fully.

The younger brother was fully dressed in his uniform, and Paul had to admit that he didn't miss those things himself. They were itchy, and always looked oversized on Paul. They did have handy pockets for holding his phone in, though.

Paul prepared toast for the two of them, before passing Mike his own and taking a seat across from him. Even though the two had eat in silence, there was something rather... Thrilling about the whole thing. It felt like old times, like a proper family breakfast. It felt so wholesome, so right.

Paul hadn't experienced a breakfast like this really since... Well, since John. And before John, it had been months since Paul had a family breakfast at the table, with Mary bed ridden for the last few months of her life.

The boy immediately swiped the memories of John and Mary away, trying to think of the present instead.

Thinking of how far he had come...

Once they boys had both finished their breakfast, the plates ended up in the sink. The plates from the previous night had yet not been washed yet. Paul sighed to himself. Jim hadn't done it.

Paul told himself he would do it once he had seen properly seen Mike off and had a shower, tossing the idea to the side for the time being.

"See you tonight, Paul." Mike smiled.

"See you tonight." Paul smiled back.

The boy soon trailed out of Paul's sight, and Paul let out a contempt sigh. Such a peaceful encounter.

He hadn't yet discussed the idea of getting a job with Mike. Last night, Mike had needed a distraction from everything, and so had Paul if he was honest with himself, meaning Paul had just not felt it was necessary to bring it up. He would talk with Mike about it later on. If he agreed, then they would have to tell their father the idea.

Paul wasn't sure what Jim would think... He loved working. Well, he didn't really, but he loved the distraction that work gave him. And so to be let into the real world, and have to face his problems... Well, no man would really like the sound of that.

But with a little bit of convincing, maybe Jim would come to his senses. He was mentally ill, and in no fit state to be working. Not until he was better.

Because he would get better.

Paul convinced himself of it.

The boy made his way upstairs, a can of Coke Zero in his hand. When he neared the top of the stairs, his ears became accustomed to a noise. It was the sound of soft snores, and they were coming from his fathers room.

Slowly, Paul headed towards the door, contemplating whether he should enter or not. But in the end, he couldn't help himself. He wanted to check on his father.

He pushed the door open, quickly entering and closing the door behind him closed almost all of the way. The room was pretty much in complete darkness, the man's blackout curtains pulled as far across as they could go. The little light that Paul could spot was coming from the small gaps around the sides of the curtains, but they created nice and pretty lighting. All that as well as the light beam that was coming from the small gap in the door.

He turned to face his father, the beam through the open door shining on his face. He looked so peaceful when he was sleeping. Deprived of any stress or sorrow. God, Paul just wished that Jim could look that peaceful all the time.

While staring at his father, that is when he decided for sure...

He would get a job.

-

The bus journey into the city was a little faster today, the morning rush hour traffic having cleared out by the time Paul caught his bus. He was glad, he didn't like public transport that much. Though it was a good excuse to listen to music over and over again.

When he had left the house, about half an hour after his and Mike's breakfast, Jim had still been asleep. He has looked to peaceful for Paul to wake him, so the boy just crept out of the front door. Jim would know that Paul was at college, so he luckily wouldn't worry about where he was.

When the bus arrived at Paul's stop, himself and a good two handfuls of other Liverpool College students all clambered off together, thanking the bus driver.

Walking into college for the second time was, once again, overwhelming for Paul. There were just so many people, all gathered around in large groups together, talking away. Sure, there were still some people alone, but to Paul it seemed like there were a lot less alone than there were together. It seemed like... Well it seemed like everyone was making friends with each-other, without him, once again.

God, if he didn't hurry up, it would soon be like high school for him.

No, he was over exaggerating... He was convincing himself of that because he was scared of it...

That's what he told himself to be reassured, but just to make sure that he wouldn't end up like his old self, he made a mental note to try and make friends with whoever he was sat next to in his next class, the only class he hadn't been to yet.

English Language.

"Paul?"

Paul turned around in confusion at a voice calling for him, furrowing his eyebrows when the only people behind him were groups of teenagers continuing to converse with each other. There was no way that they called his name.

He turned back around with a rather confused gaze still on his face, but he decided to let it slide. The boy pushed his hands into the pockets of his blue plaid over shirt, looking to the ground as he continued to walk.

"Paul!"

The voice seemed louder, but this time, almost... Next to him. As if it was coming from his shoulder.

This was getting weird.

Paul tried to ignore it, shaking his head as best as he could without seeming like a crazy idiot, and rushed through the main doors.

"Paul!" The same voice shouted again.

This time, it was too loud for Paul to ignore it. He forced himself to immediately stop in his tracks, and looked up in aggravation, ready to find the culprit.

The first, and only, person he lay his eyes on... Was John.

-
😚😌