Maybe This Time

Chapter 19

Y/N's POV

I have sa drunk Scarlett in my arms, carry her in a bridal way. The old woman is in the living room. "Did she wake up?" I asked her, she shook her head and look at Scarlett. "You two look good together," she said. I can't help but smile. I thank her for looking at Olivia.

I go upstairs and open the master's bedroom. It's quite big, she still has a good taste in designing the house. I gently laid her in the bed, I take off her shoes and the coat. I need to change her shirt and wipe down her body because of the alcohol.

I go to her closet and take a white t-shirt. I get warm water in a basin and a clean cloth. I need to control myself. Damn it, how? I tensed up as I take off her shirt. I look away and throw the dirty piece of clothing into the basket.

I get up and lower down the AC and go to the bathroom to get make-up remover wipes for her face. I carefully sit and stare at her face. I start to erase the light make-up until there was no make-up anymore. Her beauty standouts with or without makeup. Such a goddess.

I soaked the cloth with warm water and start to clean her body. I'm used to doing this to her, taking care of her when she's drunk, sick, and after we made love. I always do the aftercare.

I smoothly wipe down the alcohol on her glossy skin, from her neck to her chest. I need to look away when the clothing is on her breast. I have to control myself, I don't want to take advantage of her drunk state.

I proceed to clean her arms and hands. And when im satisfied. I gently raise her head to put on the shirt. I only look at the ceiling as if something is fascinating up there as I wear her the shirt.

"Jeez" I release a breath that im holding for a while. I'm about to go when she hold into my wrist. "Don't go" she muttered. Her eyes are slowly opening. And I stay. I sit on the floor, facing her. Her hands are begging me to hold it, so I did. I let my warm hands blanket her cold as ice hands. She shifts her body, she's now facing me.

"Do you still love me?" She asked.

"I do and it never fades, but im afraid to risk again," I admit. She nods. I place my free hand at her hair, softly caresses it.

Her soft blond hair against my palm tingle to my stomach, I look at her in so much adore and respect.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. Come back to me" she mumbles as she closes her eyes.

"I will. Wait for me" I whisper and sigh.

I wait until I know she's already asleep. I need to stay here for tonight. Carefully getting of her hands. I can't sleep here since I don't have her consent to stay here. I turn off the lamp and headed to the living room to sleep.

I find a comfortable place, my arms under my head thinking about what she confessed earlier. I know she's drunk and she doesn't have any idea what she's doing but I know what she said is true, she's a terrible liar.

"You know, I've been an idiot for letting her go... Yes, I am an idiot, stupid... but I don't have a choice-" she said, tears are rolling down from her eyes.

"I didn't think about it. I'm still in love with her; deeply, madly, crazy, truly in love with her. Until now."

I let her talk, tell everything she want to say. I guess you can't be ready about the truth until it's already slapping you straight to your face.

"I love her so much. I love Y/N so much. I didn't deny it. I always said it to people when they ask me who I love, and her name is my mouth always saying. A lot of people hated me for what I did, damn they bash me, people left me. They humiliate me. Her family and I are mad at me. Y/N treat me right, give me everything she could, even sacrifice her career but I've been a coward. I didn't fight for her." Her sobs are audible. I lost my word. Hell, I didn't know what to say, I can't even process it.