Both Jisoo and Jennie are the freshmen in the university. Jisoo is a Science student and Jennie is an International Business student. Jisoo has a small circle and Jennie is popular. They're two worlds apart but colliding into a bittersweet relations...
For a moment, her explosion felt so good for her. And for the moment, the silence that came after felt like a tranquil interlude, pleasing to the ears.
Until it wasn't. Until she finally saw Jisoo's face; and it wasn't like Jennie had seen before.
It wasn't the hurt like she saw in the corridor.
Or the anger at the nightclub after the Zico incident.
It was shame.
Jennie had hit her hard without knowing; she realized she knew who Jisoo was- but not her story.
"Jisoo... I can explain..."
"You just did, Jennie," Jisoo got up, "It's better for us not to see each other for a while. You need to go home. And I... I need to go now."
Jisoo walked away, trying to vanish into the thin air; but like a shadow, Jennie ran after her, repeating her apology, desperately trying to get to Jisoo.
Outside, it was cold and Jisoo walked aimlessly, avoiding the crowded road. Her head was still buzzing with Jennie's word and her face was warm from shame.
"Jisoo, please... Stop!"
Jisoo kept on walking, she wanted to run away from her. Jennie knew her too well, she had come to know her too well and it wasn't okay.
"You didn't even tell me you're hurt too! You didn't tell me anything! You didn't even tell me what you felt when you saw me wearing your locket! I'm done keeping my silence. What if I'm done with you, what if I stop chasing you!"
"Then stop chasing me!" Jisoo suddenly turned around to Jennie, "Then stop chasing me, Jennie... please..."
Jennie quickly hugged her, she was so relieved that Jisoo stopped.
"No... Don't go... It's cold here... Don't walk away from me..." Jennie pleaded.
Jennie tightened her embrace, trying to find the warmth under all the layers of clothes. She buried her face on Jisoo's shoulder, breathed in and out the whiff of Jisoo's skin.
They were in a quite alley and no one in sight. The fallen snow was mercilessly numbing her hands; in hurry, Jennie left her gloves in the coffeehouse.
"What can I do to make you change your mind?" she quietly whispered. Her hands grasped Jisoo's coat even tighter.
It took Jisoo a while to finally respond to what had happened, "Jennie, you don't wear your gloves?"
"You see, I'm cold. You can't leave me here..." Jennie deepened her hug.
"Here..." said Jisoo gently, her eyes were darkened and her breath was at pace; but she managed to carefully remove Jennie from her.
She then took off her gloves and put them on Jennie's hands.
"What can I do to make you change your mind, Jisoo?"
"Right now, I'm unsure about everything." Jisoo felt her throat tightened up.
"You're unsure about me?" Jennie started to cry.
"Please don't cry... No... Jennie, please..."
"You're unsure about me?" Jennie repeated her question, her voice was rough with pain. she reached out for Jisoo's hand and held it tight once she found it.
Jisoo gently wiped tears from Jennie's face, "Please don't cry... I can't really do anything right... I keep making you cry..."
"You're unsure about me..." Jennie repeated it.
"I don't know. I don't know about anything right now, seems like everything is overwhelming... What you've said earlier..."
"I was wrong, I'm sorry! Please forget what I said-"
"Jennie, you were right. I'm weak, I can't handle it. You were right, maybe it's not you... Maybe it's me. I can't... I can't handle it."
Jisoo looked defeated. These were the words that came from the darkest place of herself. A place where she buried the unwanted. A place where she actually got the most potent fuel to work hard to constantly prove herself.
And Jennie knew it, for God's sake Jennie knew it.
"Did I hurt you? I'm sorry for my words, I've been reckless with my words since last night."
Jisoo gently freed herself from Jennie's grip.
"You didn't even tell me you're hurt too... Why do you have to keep everything to yourself," Jennie said in between her sobs, her eyes filled with compassion, "Feels like I don't even know you after all this time... I don't even know what took you so long since... since the day in Jeju."
"Jennie, I need to go..."
"What am I suppose to do, Kim Jisoo?"
"Go home and get some sleep."
"Please don't leave me..."
"Then leave first. I will get your gloves from the coffeehouse. You go to your car. Drive home and get some sleep. Don't go after me."
"No..."
"Goodbye, Jennie."
Jisoo walked away, heading back to the coffeeshop. Her hands were numb from the cold. She tried to make her steps steady. In the background, she could hear the girl she loved was still crying; and her heart was tormented beyond repair.
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