Matters | JENSOO

See right through me

But with Jisoo, it was different.

"Jisoo, please say something.. Your silence hurts me."

Unexpectedly, Jisoo brought her eyes to meet Jennie's. Jennie didn't realize until that moment how swollen and dejected Jisoo's eyes were.

"What do you expect me to say, Jennie..."

"Anything, really..."

"... when you've decided not to tell me anything at all."

Her words came too soft for something that hit Jennie hard.

"I don't... Jisoo, I don't... There's nothing between him and I anymore..."

"Jennie... It's okay, you deserve-"

"My relationship with him belongs to the past, my feelings for him too. I don't even know how I feel for him right now..."

The uncertainty in her words didn't go unnoticed; Jisoo nodded weakly as her heart sinked into a deeper valley of agony.

"One thing I know that it's nothing like I feel for you! Jisoo, for me you're... Don't you see that you're-"

"Jennie, please don't..."

"What are you so afraid of, Jisoo..."

"Don't say the word you can't take back..."

"And what makes you think I want to!"

Jennie harshly raked her fingers through her hair, she was frustrated. Jisoo was really impossible to move, didn't she see how miserable they were right now?

"Can we at least try..."

"That's not how I want you..."

"So you want me?"

Jisoo didn't say anything.

"Stop responding with silence..."

Jisoo slowed down the pace, trying to make Jennie understand, "I don't want you to regret anything, I can never forgive myself for that. If there's..." Jisoo halted to gain control of her voice, "If there's something left to do, please do. You don't want to regret anything. And.. it's not like I can do better... It's... just me."

"How many times should I tell you that I don't want better?"

"You should. You deserve better."

"I don't even know what I feel about him, you're-"

Then you need to find out..."

"I don't need to, you're too foolish to see it, Jisoo. Since last year my heart has been-"

"Please don't say anything that you will regret later."

"Is that why you didn't say the word last night? Is it because you thought that you'd regret it if you said that you love me?"

What said had been said and the answer for the bold question was silence.

Jennie waited and waited, until the other girl's silence hurt too much.

"Can you at least be honest? You pretend like you do this for me," Now Jennie became aggressive, "But you're actually protecting yourself. You're too arrogant to admit that you're scared. You're never willing to get help from people-"

"How does it have anything to do with-"

"... I couldn't even buy you a phone after I broke your old one, you didn't even let me pay for coffee every time we're together and you've been trying to pay back all the..."

"Jennie, it's enough..."

"You're scared for no reason that someone you think better than you will take what's yours and your pride away!"