Sweater Weather - The Neighbourhood
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The next day, after about two and a half minutes of sleep, I packed all my stuff, shoved the unbearable idea of seeing Derek today out of my head, and got dressed.
I roused the gang, and we hit the "road" again.
Of course, as if the entire 6 hours of sleep I didn't get while thinking about how to avoid Derek for the rest of my life as long as we both shall live, was bad enough, he was standing outside my tent flap, like a statue, waiting for me.
"Oh, God." I jumped, holding my hand to my chest.
I straightened up from ducking under the flap, only to come face to face with him.
"What's up with you?" It was more of a demand, just a little less, I don't know, demand-y?
His bright green eyes analyzing and critical, reading into my every move.
"Me? Nothing." My attempt at brushing him off.
Yeah, you don't have to tell me how pathetic that was. I already know.
Derek doesn't do being brushed off.
He grabbed my upper arm and pulled me shoulder to shoulder with him. He sighed, then rolled his eyes to look down at me.
"You don't get to do that thing you do where you don't tell me stuff." He said in an "oh no, you don't" tone. "It's irritating this early in the morning."
"Well, just stick it out till noon, it'll slide into mild annoyance by then, and you'll be all set." I made a sliding gesture with my hand, forcing a smile.
Derek stared at me, clearly unamused.
"Derek," I whined, my head falling back with a groan.
"Don't 'Derek' me." He mocked my tone, shrugging his shoulders as he recreated my whiney facial expression. "Tell me, or I'll -."
"You'll what?" I'm calling his bluff.
I took a step forward, putting my hands on my hips.
After all, he does make threats on the daily. Let's see if he'll deliver.
Derek took a step forward, too, obviously going to the intimidation technique, which works for him since he is 5 inches taller than me.
"I'll use you as bait for fishing." He said, only half-joking.
In response, I shifted my weight back and crossed my arms, a defiant look on my face as I raised one eyebrow.
Try me.
With that, Derek ducked down and threw me over his shoulder, and started walking.
"What are you doing?" A smile broke over my face.
I didn't even try to escape cause I knew I couldn't.
"Goin' fishin'." He came simply.
I heard someone clear their throat; I looked upside-down between the gap of Derek's arm at who was standing in front of him.
Charlie.
Wow, this day just gets better and better.
"Yes?" I asked, all the blood rushing to my head.
"Hush." Derek smacked the back of my thigh where he was holding me. "Yes?" Derek copied.
I scoffed, feeling slightly exposed at the fact that my backside was over Derek's shoulder. Yeah, what Charlie stumbled upon didn't look good. I mean, if it was just me, maybe.
"Just because we are a "family"," Charlie made air quotes. "Doesn't mean what's mine is yours." He said levelly, trying to keep the jealousy off his face.
Oh, snap.
Okay, Derek, put me down.
"We have some things to discuss," Derek said, not acknowledging the dirt Charlie flung his way.
He waited a moment, and when Charlie's features didn't waver, he set me down.
"Meet me at the lake," Derek said in a challenging tone while looking at Charlie.
An unreadable expression on his face before stalking off towards the water.
"You don't need to be an ass," I said, crossing my arms over my chest.
"And you don't need to have yours two inches from his face." Charlie challenged.
Wow, okay, jumping right in.
"You think I voluntarily ended up like that?" I took a step forward.
"Was he holding you against your will?" Charlie asked.
Well, not exactly.
I shifted uncomfortably and blew out a heavy breath.
"Look, you can't just walk away from me, then go around marking your territory," I said, going on the offense.
"What, did you think I was done?" He asked, raising his voice a touch.
"That's what it felt like." I defended, the hardness in my voice starting to soften.
"I don't give up that easily," Charlie said in a lowered voice, and he closed the space between us.
He looked down at me, and I looked up at him.
I knew I'd regret it, but I took a slow step back. I heard him scoff, but I was too afraid of what I'd find on his face.
"Look, you either want me or you don't. So which is it going to be?" He asked in a demanding tone.
Stuff between Charlie and me was a mess, an absolute mess. And I didn't know where to start cleaning up. I didn't even know if I wanted to clean up or just condemn it.
I was sure of one thing, though. I loved Charlie. I just didn't know if I wanted to. I didn't know if he wanted me to. And I was too afraid to find out.
With that, he nodded and turned away from me.
"Wait." I started after him. "Charlie, don't...." I whimpered.
God, if I loved him, why couldn't I tell him?
Why did it scare me so much to love him?
Is it because I may love someone else too?
"No, now I'm done." Charlie whirled on me.
Say, something idiot!
Tell him!
But I couldn't.
Before I could stop it, a single tear rolled down my cheek.
What do you do when you know the answer, but it's too late? You say nothing.
