Meant to Be My Balance

Chapter 54

By the time I finally made it to the boat, I had a party of one-hundred civilians that were sure to make Aleksander furious. But, as I would remind him, their pain was his fault. Children had debris stuck in their arms, mothers screamed about the darkness that had almost engulfed their families. I soothed every one with a beam of warm, golden light, and promised them safety in Ravka.

Most looked at me like I was their worst enemy—the way they had spent centuries looking at Aleksander. But Rasmus must have been telling some sort of truth, because I was surprised by how many of the Fjerdans recognized—no celebrated—me once they found out I was the Sun Summoner.

The march to the pier had grown icy and bitter, the wind pushing against us fervently. I was exhausted—I had Cut through my cell, confronted the King and Queen, stopped Aleksander from tearing Fjerda apart, and rallied our few supporters in the Ice Court, all with no sleep. But it was almost second nature for me to lift my hands up and let the sun bathe around our group, warming us to our bones. I hoped the refugees wouldn't recognize the slowing of my steps, how I stumbled through the thick layer of snow. The pain at my wrist didn't help, and I'd taken to keeping a piece of string on my hand, tightening it when the sting worsened.

It was the thought of Aleksander that strengthened me. That made me stand straight, tall. To raise my voice as I led the group, to focus on our destination. All to see him again, feel his arms around me, feel his lips against mine.

I almost collapsed at the sight of Aleksander in front of the ship, his nichevo'ya guarding the perimeter. Nikolai and Mal stood at his each side, and the breath left my chest at the sheer relief that someone like Aleksander was still here, not an illusion, but here for me. To aid me, to love me, until the end of time.

I didn't even realize I was in his arms, until their cool embrace surrounded me, the familiar feeling of his shadows around my ankles, his lips soft against my forehead.

"It's all right, Alina. I'll take things from here. Go, rest." His voice was a soft, dark caress. Gentle, yet firm.

"But the families—"

"I see that." He barely suppressed his frustration. "But you've been on your feet for far too long."

When he leaned down to kiss me, his lips lingered, and his hold on my waist was almost possessive. It wasn't until he looked up and met Mal's eyes that I realized what he was doing. I wouldn't have been surprised if he had been smirking at Mal over my shoulder when I threw my arms around him.

"Aleksander," I whispered, glaring at him.

"What did I just tell you, Alina?" His eyes stayed on Mal, but his words were light for me.

I sighed softly. "Don't hurt the families—they're refugees. Nikolai will tell me if you do."

Aleksander raised his eyebrows. "Not the tracker?"

I stiffened, my eyes glancing over Mal. I pointedly ignored Aleksander's comment. "The spy for the royal family—Dorbin, I think—said there was a Grimjer cousin who was more weak-minded. If we get him on the throne—"

"Alina." His quartz eyes met mine. "Goodnight."

I rolled my eyes. "Goodnight, Aleksander."

***

I had gone to sleep on a pallet belowdeck, giving up on searching for any blankets. I would've slept on top of a volcano at this point.

But when I woke, it was in soft sheets that made the creaky planks of the boat feel...comfy? Warmth filled my very core, the sleep giving me a sense of calm I hadn't felt in a long time. Not since I left Os Alta.