One Piece One Shots

Hit Me [Sanji x FtM!Reader]

Notes:
-FtM: female to male (trans man).
-This is the first time I'm writing a trans character/reader; apologies if I wrote a bad or offensive representation of this and please tell me if I did and how I can change it.

<<>>

You used to be a ballet dancer.

Graceful, elegant, beautiful.

Your parents had pushed you to pursue this path when they saw that you had the talent for it. It was their dream, and their dream to see you succeed.

You ran away when they found out and reacted to how you really felt.

You ended up aboard this ship, where everyone accepted you. Except him.

He would never hit a woman.

He physically couldn't.

"Black Leg" Sanji, a prince, a cook, and a feminist, would never hurt a woman even if it killed him.

He knew that you were a woman. Your voice, your chest, your face, your body all told him so. He swooned over you, getting you anything and everything you wanted or needed to the best of his abilities.

"Hit me" was not a wish he could fulfill, as simple as that was.

You asked nicely, you provoked him, you tried to trick him, nothing got him to break his oath.

You admired his chivalry; you really did. But even if he didn't hurt you physically, you hurt in so many other ways. You wanted his acceptance.

Everyone else had, even Chopper, who you doubted would understand your transition at first. After some time and some explanation, though, he understood.

"Do you think you can change me?" you asked after some time.

"Physically?" Chopper looked up from his desk curiously. "I've been looking into it ever since you told me, but all I can suggest is taking testosterone shots. You could try contacting Trafalgar Law for a more permanent surgery."

"That's a good idea," you said, more to yourself than to him. "Not sure how I would get in contact with him though. He would definitely want a payment of sorts, too." You smiled at Chopper. "Well, anyhow, thanks Chopper!"

You walked out his room after the reindeer expressed that he supposedly did not want your gratitude.

"Why would you do that?" Sanji asked right as you came out. He had obviously been listening to the conversation. "You're perfect the way you are!"

You knew he meant no ill will, but it still hurt. You didn't feel perfect.

"Hit me," you said to him, ignoring his words. It had to be over a hundred times you asked him. You wanted his acceptance and affirmation. You wanted him to acknowledge that you were not a woman.

"[Y/N]-chan—"

"Kun."

"[Y/N]-kun," Sanji quickly changed his honorific as you corrected him, "I'm sorry. I... I can't."

He had a darkened look on his face, and you couldn't tell if he was angry at himself for not being able to do it, or angry at you for wanting him to do it.

"I understand," you said monotonously. "I can never be a man in your eyes, can I? I will always be a woman in your eyes and you can never hit a woman."

It was the cold, hard "truth".

Sanji looked down, knowing that even if he couldn't hit you, the truth was already a punch in the gut for you.

He raised a fist, staring at it for a moment. You drew in a quick breath, knowing he would drop it and be gone in a second.

It was always like that. He would start to do something, then chicken out before following through. He raised your hopes for a split second, and shattered them just as quickly.

This time however, he raised it back, as if readying a punch. He'd never used his hands to fight, but for some reason, this seemed to be an exception for him. Why would he use his hands to hit you?

You closed your eyes, doubting he'd hit you despite the fact that this was the furthest he'd even come to doing so.

And you were right. You felt a breeze against your face and you opened your eyes to see his fist inches from you, unable to make contact.

He caressed your cheeks instead, a frown on his face. His eyes almost seemed to tear up, and you couldn't understand why. He was conflicted with himself.

"Hit me," you repeated.

And suddenly, his hand moved away swiftly and just as quickly slapped across your cheek.

It stung. The pain stung, but you could barely feel it. Others can call you a masochist, but you felt a wave of satisfaction hit you.

Before you could react, Sanji let out a sort of choked, guttural sound and turned. He avoided your gaze, fleeing to the kitchen, his natural habitat.

"Sanji!" you called after him. When he didn't respond or return back, you hesitantly followed him.

He did it.

You opened the door to see him at the table. One hand covered his face miserably, and the other that slapped you was outstretched on the table, laying far away from him, as if he was disgusted at himself, at his own hand.

"I'm sorry, [Y/N]-kun," Sanji mumbled.

You sat down next to him, taking his hand in yours. You weren't sure how you could comfort and reassure him. "Thank you."

"But it just feels so... wrong." Sanji tensed up, biting back his words. "But I know it's right. I can't push this feeling away. And...."

You bit your lip, listening to his mumbles.

"I didn't want to hit you not just because I saw you as a woman," Sanji finally said after a moment.

"What other reason is there?"

He paused, avoiding eye contact with you. "I realized, as I... hit you... that it was because I love you." He looked up at you with a sad expression. "And... it's difficult to hit someone you love. I know this seems like an excuse for avoiding hitting you. I'm not going to deny that me seeing you as a woman played a part, but... that also... really did."

You stared at him, shocked and not knowing what to say and how to respond to his confession.

"And," he continued before you could think of somehow, covering his face again, but not moving the hand you held, "I know you might not feel the same way. You might be attracted to women, too, I don't know. I don't even know what this would make me. I don't know... I don't understand, but...." His voice became more and more panicked, until it became a jumbled mess of mumbles and worries.

"Sanji."

He looked up immediately, face red and eyes tearing up in frustration at himself.

You smiled, and wordlessly intertwined your fingers with his. "It's okay."