Growing Into You (First Draft; Unedited)

xxvi.

“I’ll go wake him up, meet us at the front when you’re ready.” Devi walked past me, side eyeing me. I watched her leave before following her out. 

My stomach was growling, I hadn’t eaten very much yesterday, just the soup. I stopped at Kuna’s kitchen. They weren’t there but there was a tray of lemon tarts on the table. I got out a small tray and put two on them, of course after I ate a few myself. One for the lady--Alexandra if she was awake.

I balanced the tray on one hand and walked out of the Servants’ Wing and up the stairs. I made my way to the library first. If she wasn’t in there I would check her room. Luckily I didn’t have to do that. She had already gotten ready, her hair was slightly damp and tied into a bun, she was wearing her usual dress without the corset. She was sitting in the same chair reading the same book but it looked like she was almost finished.

I didn’t say anything as I walked over to her and placed the tray in front of her. Lady Dupon didn’t look up. I hugged the nightgown to my chest, fighting off the butterflies.

“My lady?”

She still didn’t look up. “I don’t like waking up alone.”

I froze, feeling very awkward. “I’m sorry, Alexandra.” That worked. Her head shot up to look at me before looking at the nightgown in my arms.

“Come, sit next to me.” 

I sat down next her. “I’m sorry, I can’t stay long. I need a sword then I’m leaving for the duel.”

Lady Dupon tilted her head a bit. “Do you want to borrow the same one as yesterday?” I nodded and she continued. “You may use it. . . as long as we finish that game from last night. I believe it’s your turn.”

That sounded fair. “This is not my question but. . . can I ask you something?”

Lady Dupon shifted to be fully facing me. “Just this once.”

“Would you go to the duel?”

Her face darkened and she moved back. “I will not. I do not like seeing. . . my workers. . . injured.”

Was that really your reason? “Of course, my lady.”

She stood up. “Come, let’s get you a sword.”

We walked to her room and she opened the door. The bed had been made and any indication that she slept here was gone. She reached her hand out and I took it.

“The nightgown, dear.”

My face immediately flushed bright red and I drew my hand back quickly. I handed her the nightgown and clasped my hands together before looking down. Why can’t I just not be embarrassing. . .

She put the nightgown on top of the dresser and held out the sword and the belt. “Here, and I never got to thank you for bringing me the lemon tarts, I’ll try them after you’re on your way.”

I just nodded and grabbed it. I wasn’t going to tie around my waist just yet. “Thank you, my lady.”

“Do you need help getting it on?”

No. “Yes.”

She raised an eyebrow and took the belt and sword back. She unfastened the belt and took a step towards me. She wrapped it around my waist and pulled me closer, there was only a few inches of space in between us now. The whole time, she kept her eyes on me. The icy blue shimmered in the light.

I could feel her body heat as she started to fasten the belt, adjusting it so the sword was on my right side. When she finished she didn’t move her hands. She kept them on my waist. I didn’t know what to do with my hands. Was she going to try to kiss me again? My heart fluttered at the idea. She lifted one of her hands to my cheek. I wrapped my arms around her waist, inhaling the vanilla scent that perpetually on her skin. 

Her eyes softened as her thumb caressed my cheek, getting closer to my lips. I leaned in slightly as if I was begging her to lean in and kiss me. I pulled her closer to me so that there wasn’t any space in between us anymore.

“Jayen. . .” She whispered, dropping her eyelids and staring at my lips.

The door swung open and she pushed herself away from me. I stuck out my hands for balance and turned my head. Maj was standing in the doorway, her expression unreadable. Please don’t tell Aoife.

“I apologize for the interruption. I was coming to wake you, my lady.” Maj’s voice was monotone. Uh-oh. I felt like a kid getting caught with their hand in a cookie jar even if nothing she said was directed at me.

“I, um. I should be on my way.” I ducked my head down and moved past Maj who stepped aside me. I didn’t look at either of them and did not wait for permission as I ran down the stairs and into the main entrance. I’m sure they were waiting for me outside.