Stardust & Smiles ✅

Chapter 18: One First Kiss, Two Hearts Broken

"Can you ever stop loving someone?"
"You never stop loving.  Once you love someone, honestly, truly, you will never be able to un-love them."

~Two days after the wedding~
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I wake up ironically blissful. 
   
Then, of course, life picks up right where it left off. 

Me, alone, in my bed with my heart weighing me down, like a rock pinning a loose piece of paper to the sidewalk on a windy day. 

I sigh and reach over to scribble a few lines into my journal that must've been inspired by last night's dream.  As a writer, I keep a journal next to me at all times to write down whatever inspirations, ideas, or one-liners might pop into my head at whatever random time of the day. 

I stretch and reach for my phone again.  I avoid my message notifications, swiping them away before my eyes can read the names I know are there.  Instead, I lazily scroll through my Instagram feed until my heart stops. 

Liam posted something.

Liam fucking posted something. 

I cautiously click to it. 

Of course it's pictures from the wedding.  Of course it's got a ridiculously cryptic caption.

The pictures of us are alright, I guess.  Nothing that would make anyone think anything I seriously can't have them thinking.  There's a posed photo of us standing next to each other, smiling happily in the sunshine.  There's a photo of us with Leilani and Weston.  I forgot we even took that quickly.  There's a photo of the decorations and the food.  I swipe to the final slide and sigh.

I thought he was taking a selfie or something, because his smile was bigger than usual, which is saying something.  I was across the room, taking a moment to take everything in and calm myself down a little bit more.  My eyes had begun to wander around and finally land back on Liam.  Somehow I always end up landing near him in some way.

I wasn't staring. 

Okay, maybe I was staring just a little bit.  I didn't think he saw me.  I thought he was busy taking selfies for some strange reason. 

Oh my god.  My cheeks suddenly color pink as I realize that he was staring at me through the camera staring at him.  I smack my forehead.  I can be such an idiot sometimes.  I look back down at the picture and blush some more. 

The expression clear on my face can only be described as loving.  It's clear as day to anyone who sees this picture that I'm looking at something I love. 

I look great in the picture, not gonna lie.  My dress is shiny, my hair is perfectly curled, my makeup is flawless, and well, it's hard to find someone that has a bad facial expression when they're looking at something that makes them glow.  I look like a freaking goddess, if I'm being completely honest (and clearly very humble, too). 

I'm starting to understand why he kissed me.  Hell, if he would have looked at me like that, I don't know if I would've been able to contain myself.  I blink faster, willing the tears away.  Can't figure out if they're of sadness or joy or just from being overwhelmed. 

My heartbeat speeds up as I reread the caption.  The caption that will probably come back to haunt me in the next few days as I explain myself to my friends, mainly, Elaine and eventually Archer. 

"Did my heart love 'till now?  Forswear it, sight!  For I never saw true beauty 'till this night."   

Fuck.