A NEW WORLD

Chapter 19: PREPARATION

Yoo Cheol inclined his head. "That however would mean you should have also remembered Kwang Jae."

Jong Woo huffed annoyed. "Jeez, I don't know! I guess my head is just messed up like that. Speaking of Kwang Jae, did he never suspect you knew more than you should?"

Yoo Cheol stiffly shook his head. "At first I wanted to confront him for what he had done, but I suspected a tragic accident would soon happen to me too. I started collecting information about the Renovation-guild but all I ever got was that he must have been in a rather high position. They tried burning the lab once, thus Nam Jin decided to keep the next location secret. I only wish she would have never told me."

Jong Woo raked his hands through his messy hair and tried to wrap his mind around all the new information. "It just doesn't make any sense that I would still be alive. I understand he was in this guild which apparently wanted the chaos, thus their attacks at my parents because they were afraid they would find a solution that could prevent it. But what did I ever do to them? He never tried to kill Moon Jo right? And why does he want me dead now? I mean, after all this time living right under his nose?"

"Well, I'm sure at first you were just an innocent baby who had to be sacrificed for the greater good. And one that fit nicely in his plans. If he only came across you now, I might have argued that he is just shocked that you survived and wants to finish what he started. But apparently he was content with letting you live your life right next to him for years. Maybe he fears that you would eventually remember? I don't doubt he would kill me if he came to the conclusion that I know the truth about the accident."

"Yeah well but if he was afraid I might remember, he would have killed me long ago, right? Why the wait?"

Yoo Cheol shrugged. "It must have something to do with the reappearance of Seo Moon Jo. As you just proved this evening, familiar faces can trigger memories to come forth."

Jong Woo grinned weakly. "It might be just a tad suspicious if I ran to Moon Jo and told him about Kwang Jae."

Yoo Cheol raised his eyebrows. "Suspicious?"

Jong Woo looked at him bewildered. "I can't bloody well tell him now that you had something to do with it, can I? You seem to be under the impression that he isn't that murderous anymore but let me tell you; he can get back to that real quick."

Yoo Cheol's expression remained blank and tight.

"I live with the shame and self-hatred every day. I would never blame you if you told him what you know now. Logically it would have been wiser to not tell anyone, but when Ki Hyeok told me about you then I knew I just had to, you at least deserve to know the truth."

Jong Woo stared at the uncomfortable man in front of him. There was a resigned look in his eyes, as if he was sure that Jong Woo would sell him out to Jeoseung Saja.

Jong Woo wondered if Yoo Cheol secretly hoped he would.

"I forgive you," he said suddenly. He hadn't really meant to say that but the words were out before he could stop them.

They felt right and Jong Woo realised that he really did forgive the tormented man sitting at his table.

"Don't," whispered Yoo Cheol painfully, "don't ever say that. No matter how kind your heart might be, there are things one cannot forgive."

"You forget that in the end, it was me who burnt them... You said you don't deserve to live, but how did I deserve to survive?" asked Jong Woo bitterly.

"You were a baby. I was a fully grown up man—..."

"...Who was madly in love with a women who married a jerk and who got manipulated and deceived by Kwang Jae," smiled Jong Woo. "You have to stop hating yourself and start blaming Kwang Jae, he is the one responsible for this mess, not you."