The Chronicles of You ✔

⭐︎ 0.1 ⭐︎

            Your funeral was held on the Saturday after we lost you. Your extended family was there, so I finally got to meet all of your aunts, uncles, cousins, and your grandparents. They all told me how they had heard so many stories about me, and one of your aunts- Andrea was her name- said to me, “That boy was in love with you. Anyone could see it, it was in the way he talked about you, and it was in his eyes. He would always smile when anyone said your name. I just wanted you to know that, that he did love you.” She smiled sadly at me, and I said quietly, “Thank you.”

            I couldn’t go to the viewing the day before; I walked in, and then I couldn’t bring myself to look at you, so I turned around and walked back out of the room. Your brother came out behind me, and we sat on the steps together, trying not to cry.

            At the funeral, your family had asked me to speak, so I had written a eulogy to say beforehand. After a couple of your cousins and family members, and Nick had spoken, they asked me to come up. Your brother, sister, and parents still had yet to speak. I read my eulogy, and tried not to cry, "Hi, for those of you who don't know me, Elijah Calloway was my boyfriend. I know exactly what you're thinking, I'm too young to know anything about love. But you're wrong, because Eli loved me, and I loved Eli. He was the most amazing person I've ever met. He used bring flowers to school for me for no reason at all, and he always insisted on paying and holding doors. He was so good, and it's not fair that he didn't have a chance to show anyone else how incredible he was. In the past year, so many people have told me, 'you're too young for this' or 'you're just a little girl, you can't be that in love with him' or 'you shouldn't have to go through all of this' or -and this one is the best- 'at this age, there is no way that you're so attached to that boy that you can't focus on anything else'. Well guess what? When you fall in love someone, age doesn't matter. Nothing matters, in fact, but the person you're in love with. And when that person gets sick, there is no worse pain. Watching Eli get sicker and sicker is the hardest thing I have ever done. I've never cried so much in my entire life. It's the worst pain imaginable, when you have to live each day in fear of losing the person you love. Eli and I talked about the future a few times, and he always said he hoped we were together in the future. One time, we talked about what our wedding would look like if we were to get married. He teased me and laughed, and told me that my Dad was going to be bankrupt after my wedding, because apparently I have a taste for expensive things. He told me he wanted to be at my wedding, so he could see me in a wedding dress, even if I wasn't marrying him. He's never going to be able to see me in a wedding dress now, and I will never be able to marry him. It kills me, but I also know that Eli would want me- all of us- to be smiling. And that hurts, too, because it's hard not to miss him. It's hard to smile now. I miss being able to tease him, I miss getting flowers from him, and I miss all the sweet things he would say. I will always miss him, and I will always be in love with him. He was such a big part of my life. I don't think I've ever met someone else quite like him. He was a one in a million kind of guy. He believed in me so much that it made me believe in me. I think one of my fondest memories of him is when he asked me to be his girlfriend. We were in Spanish class, and he tried to ask me in Spanish, but he didn't know how to say it. And I could only say yes and laugh. He was so good that he tried to spare me the pain; he tried to spare everyone. Elijah Calloway was the strongest person I have ever met, he was strong enough to fight cancer once, and he was strong enough to let go of someone he loved to spare her from being broken. He was strong enough fight as long as he could, and even though it kills me to lose him, I know that he's not in pain anymore. He's all better now. Let's celebrate Elijah Calloway, because it was a pleasure to have met him and to have fallen in love with him. And it was a privlidge to have my heart broken by him. So here's to Elijah Calloway, and the beautiful person he was and had yet to be." I started crying as soon as I finished, and then I walked back to where I was sitting with your family. People actually started to clap, and most of the room was in tears.

        Just as I made it back to my spot next to your brother, I heard the people in front of us whisper, "I would hate to be the person who has to follow that." Emmett heard too, and he looked at me with a small smile and said, "Yeah, I'm the person who has to follow that up. You've got to be so perfect, El." He hugged me, and whispered, "Stay strong," before heading up to make his eulogy.

        Afterwards, people milled around and conversed, and I saw a group of kids from school who never even spoke to you; who I heard talking crap about you more than once. I was so angry that they were there; they couldn't possibly have cared about you. I started walking towards them, and said, "I don't know who you think you are, but what makes you think you have the right to show up here when you never cared one bit about Eli-" I never got to finish, because suddenly Emmett was behind me, holding me back and muttering an apology for my behavior.

        "Take a deep breath. You and I both know that my brother would not want you to beat someone up at his funeral. Maybe at school on the last day, but not here, in a church," Emmett said in my ear, trying to make me crack a smile to cheer me up towards the end. I couldn't even answer him, I just made a sobbing sound and burst into tears. Your brother walked me to a pew in the back of the church, and hugged me tightly. I could feel his tears falling on the top of my head, and he whispered quietly, "I know, I miss him too. Every minute, every day."

        Emmett is kind of like the sun, he comes out and dries up the rain, and then makes a rainbow.