Amore Mio (#4)

Chapter 34: Monsters In My Head

Cold air pricked the bare skin of my torso and legs like icy needles. After the rainstorm, the clouds had cleared, but left behind the freezing breeze. I didn't oppose it for I needed it.

          Sleep had forsaken me long ago. It was low when my mind was occupied with searching Arie and Athena, but after what Mike forced to light all those weeks ago and seeing a spitting image of myself leveraging the life of my love before my eyes forced away any semblance of rest from my mind.

          However, tonight was different. I lost myself in Arie. In her body, in her scent, her thoughts. She made me forget everything and I relished the feeling of just her. My salvation she had always been.

But the bruises I left on her beautiful body in the wake of our sexual thrill were alarming. I was worried I hurt her. I did hurt her. Maybe I lost myself a bit too much. After all, we did fuck till early hours of the morning. She'd be sore when she'd awaken, and I'd be here this time. To hold her. To kiss and nurture her back to full strength and health. I should've let her heal all the way before fucking the life out of her.

          From the glass door of the balcony, I watched her peacefully sleeping under the covers. The warm glow from the lamp kissed her olive skin. She was utterly breathtaking.

          I couldn't leave her tonight like I did all the nights prior after she fell asleep in my arms. It had pained me to leave her alone, but I couldn't bother her with the monsters wreaking havoc in my head. They were tormenting me with the memories that had flooded my mind bit by bit.

          Complete and utter despair had filled me. And I couldn't dump that on Arie or allow her to witness it after all that she had been through. She didn't need the burden of my demons.

          All the sleepless nights led me to carving the ones who hurt her. Lawrence Kane, the bastard who sold girls as slaves, rotted in the cells below.

          And Rex, the fucker who worked with... with him, refused to bark after I broke him over and over. He was loyal to the bone, which would eventually lead to his demise. He didn't release a single bit of information. Admirable trait but stupid.

Zaya... the conniving whore who sold Arie out and destroyed a puzzle piece Verona left behind. She was still breathing for now. She wouldn't receive an easy death. None of them would.

My hands were either tainted with blood every night or my mind was being strangled with vicious memories that were haunting me too much to allow me even a second of peace.

          Or I buried myself in running my empire. I couldn't let it fall when my mind was in pieces itself, running wild with the thoughts finding him. As expected, he was off the grid.

          Serenity only graced me with its presence when Arie was around. Only then could I breathe a little from the sea of anguish I was drowning in.