Three boys loved me in three different ways; the first one who saw me as someone who can play fire with him, the second one, whose heart was pure, obey and respected me. And lastly, the one who saw me inside and out yet accepted me despite my flaws...
Rất tiếc! Hình ảnh này không tuân theo hướng dẫn nội dung. Để tiếp tục đăng tải, vui lòng xóa hoặc tải lên một hình ảnh khác.
Isaac patiently taught me the word of God. It was never been easy to accept your fault but through God's words it felt like I was being peeled and have a renewed skin. I let my guard down and accepted the word of God in my life. We often pray for everything with Pastor Fritzy. They both have the calm presence, the reason why I felt comfortable being surrounded with them.
Aside of reading books I started doing another hobby, painting.
Taon ang lumipas. Tuluyang nabuo ang pagkakaibigan namin ni Isaac. Hindi gaya ng samahan namin nila Swanda at Kailli, si Isaac ay para bukas na librong handa akong tanggapin kahit ipakita ko ang maruming ugali.
He never judge me. Sometimes, I had this thought of telling him my dark past but same reason always made me just leave it behind and move forward.
Hindi nga lang naging madali sa akin na maging normal, gaya ng paglabas o makisalamuha bukod sa kanilang dalawa. Kalahating taon bago ko tuluyang napagdesisyunan na lumabas upang tulungan si mommy sa pagtatrabaho. Nananatiling takot ngunit wala akong choice. Kailangan naming umusad at kailangan kong tulungan ang aking sarili.
Wala akong kaalam-alam!
Financially we were shaking. Dad was getting worst, my mother was striving hard even if she was once sent to the Hospital because of over fatigue. Kung hindi pa nadulas si Pastor Fritzy ay hindi ko pa malalaman. Magkasabay niyang ginagawa ang trials na tinanggap at pagbabantay sa amin ni Daddy. Kung siguro ako ang magbabantay kay daddy ay mababawasan ang kanyang alalahanin.
But I never visited my father in the Hospital, actually he was included to my trauma. Seeing him might remind me some scenes I don't want to remember again. And the thought of his selfish decision and expectation triggered my fear to see him.
Masamang anak kung tutuusin dahil iniisip kong parusa sa kanya ang nangyaring iyon. Nguni tang impact noon ay sa aking ina.
Minsan kong narinig si mommy na may kausap sa telepono, nakikiusap na mag-extend ng palugit para sa bayad ng Hospital bill ni daddy. Nahihirapan na siya ngunit hindi siya nagreklamo. Hindi ko kakayaning maging siya na nag-iisang sandigan ko ay bumigay gawa ng pagod para sa akin at kay daddy. Kung hindi ko man kayang bantayan si Dad, baka sa parteng pagtulong sa financial namin ay malaking ambag.
Sa mga sumunod na buwan, para tuluyang tulungan ang aking sarili ay nag-open up ako kay mommy na mag-aaral ulit ako.
"Let's do that, Darling."
"I will get my part-time job at the same time study here at home. Don't' worry about my tuition fees."
"Anak kita, Eury. Responsibility kita. Let me handle the financial and you worry only your studies."
Hindi ako kumbinsido na may pera pa siya. Pero nagulat akong ay dumating na notice na magsisimula na ako sa pag-aaral next week. I confronted mom and she just told me she sell our land in the Philippines. It shocked me but in the end I realized I will never set my foot there. What was the sense of having our house there anymore?
