The Emo Trinity/Quartet Book 2

The Free Chef (An Entire Episode Where Bob Cooks For Them)

"Congratulations! You won a FREE CHEF!"

"What the heck are you doing? It's 3 AM," an annoyed Frank Iero sleepily rubbed his eyes, glaring at the salesman.  But as his eyes adjusted, he saw who it really was.

"BILLIE JOE ARMSTRONG!" Frank dropped to one knee, as if to pray or beg for forgiveness.

"Of course.  Also, get up," Billie said, growing tired of the Quartet's groveling natures whenever he was around.  Sure, he was a good musician and all, but they didn't need to worship him.

"Oh, certainly! What was it that I won again?" Frank asked, standing up.

"You -- and the rest of the house -- have won a FREE CHEF!" Billie announced, as if on a game show.

"Oh boy! Is it Gordon Ramsey?" Frank asked excitedly.

"No."

"Guy Fieri?"

"No... It's actually Bob."

Somewhere behind them, Mikey Way's body thudded to the floor.

.

.

.

In the morning, the Quartet was awoken by sharp knocking on each of their doors.  "WAKE UP OR STARVE!" someone shouted.

"Oh no... it's real..." Frank groaned, recognizing Bob's voice.  So it hadn't been a nightmare -- Bob was actually their free chef.  For how long? Billie Joe never specified.  Hey, I guess this is why he was free, haha.  Frank looked over at Mikey, too see what the bassist's reaction was.  Mikey was pale, shivering under the covers.

There was another knock at the door.  "WAKE UP! I HAD TO SLEEP ON YOUR COUCH, ONLY TO WAKE UP AND COOK FOR YOU! BE APPRECIATIVE!" Mikey whimpered and buried himself deeper into the blanket.

"GO AWAY, IDIOT!" Frank shouted. Bob just pounded on the door harder.

Meanwhile, Joe had been woken up by Bob's pounding, and stared at the blonde ex-drummer in shock.  "Uhhh... who's this?"

"That's our worst enemy," Gerard replied.  "Bob."

"I made you dolts a meal.  Go and eat it," Bob said snarkily, directing the words at Joe.

"Okay!" Joe said, not caring that MCR's rude drummer was now their chef.  He skipped off into the kitchen.

"Is it vegan?" Andy asked.  "Or even just vegetarian?"

"No and no," Bob said.  "I forgot that you were vegan."

"Convienent, huh?" Frank snapped, getting up and opening the door.  "Whatever.  Let's just eat."

A few minutes later, the bands had gathered around their dining room table and bar, as Bob dished out eggs and sausage links to them.  Frank and Andy grimaced at the meal -- Frank could only eat the eggs, and Andy couldn't eat anything! Everyone else dug in.

After a few minutes of watching Andy stare at his plate dejectedly, Frank stood up.  "I can't take this.  I'm making something vegan for Andy and I."

"Ah ah ah," Bob tsked.  "I'M the cook, remember? If you don't want to eat my stuff, too bad."

"Well can you at least TRY and make something vegan next time? Or at least vegetarian?" Frank asked.

"Sure, whatever," Bob said nonchalantly, which only made Frank hate him more.  Why'd we ever hire him anyways? Well... he was a good drummer.  Until he wasn't.

After breakfast, the group dispersed.  Frank decided to blow off steam via playing guitar.  He walked down the hall to MCR's room, picked up his guitar, and began to sing the first song that came to mind.  (Yes I know this isn't Frank singing, imagine it is)