The Fire Inside (Sebastian Vettel)

2. A Season of Discontent

A/N: Just want to say that in no way is Carla based on Hanna. She is totally fictitious. Carla is a bitch.  Hanna is a queen 💚

So in the end it turned out that Carlos Sainz was the poor bugger Ferrari had signed to replace him. Seb hoped that Carlos realised he'd have to play second fiddle to Charles.

Seb was feeling so low. Being in lockdown was beginning to stress him out. He and Carla were barely talking. They'd even begun to sleep in separate rooms. The girls seemed to be picking up on the tension and had started acting up. He tried to spend as much time with them as he could when not training. It was important to keep up with his fitness so he trained 6 days a week still.

One day he was out in the garden with Leah. They were playing Tag. He had to let her catch him of course.

"Daddy," she said.

"Yes Leah?"

"Why doesn't that man come around any more?" Seb felt his heart rate speed up.

"What man my sweet?" he asked.

"The tall man. The one that brings me and Klara sweets and kisses Mummy." Seb froze. He knew he and Carla had grown apart. He had suspected she had cheated on him, but to bring a man here and kiss him in front of their children....how could Carla stoop so low?

He had to bite his tongue all day. Once the girls were in bed he confronted Carla with what Leah had told him.

"Seb," she laughed, nervously.  "She is six years old. She doesn't know what she is saying."

"She must have got it from somewhere Carla! Don't treat me like a fucking idiot!"he spat. "You think I haven't noticed how off you've been with me? For once just tell me the truth. Have you been cheating on me?" Carla denied it and the argument continued throughout the evening.

Seb eventually stalked off to bed, furious that Carla was making their daughter out to be a liar. Leah may only be six years old but he knew who he believed.   It was only for the girls sake that he hadn't thrown Carla out. He was done with that woman. He may have loved her once but now he felt nothing for her.  Another thing in his life that he had lost.

He fiercely scrubbed the tears off of his face as he brushed his teeth. He then climbed into bed. As he lay staring at the ceiling, the face of the girl in pink appeared in his mind. Damn, he wished she was here now. He could do with a good hard fuck to get his frustrations out. Yeah, probably best she wasn't here. He didn't want to scare her. He definitely wasn't feeling like his usual self and a hard rough fuck would have helped.  He fell asleep eventually, but it was a restless sleep. A pattern that would repeat itself in the following days.

                      ***

July soon came around, and with it the  start of the 2020 season. Seb had been so glad to get away from home, even though he would miss his girls like crazy. He and Carla were so far apart now thst he couldn't see a way back. Maybe it was time to move on. If she could cheat, why shouldn't he?

But with the covid bubbles and the social distancing that would be prove to be impossible.  He felt so isolated and alone. He thanked God for Antti and for Britta. Their friendship kept him going through the dark days. And there were plenty of them. Ferrari had shifted their total focus onto Charles.

They denied having a number 1 driver but Seb had most definitely been moved to the bottom of the pecking order. The SF1000 was the worst car he'd had since being at Ferrari. It was pretty much undriveable. Charles struggled too but nowhere near as much as Seb did. He often wondered if they had the same car. He had to believe they did.