The secrets within us -Sirius black.

'But i loved you..'

Song for this chapter:
Only by RY X.

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We started 7th year three weeks ago .
Maybe because it's our last year at Hogwarts it isn't that hard and our assignments are starting to become less and less gradually.

I was sitting on the couch laying my head on Sirius' shoulder . He was reading and i was trying to sleep until .

Someone got into my mind . Regulus . I sat up and put my hand on my temple and scrunched my nose .
'I need to see you Scarlett , now'

I opened my eyes . All our friends were in the common room and it was past curfew . It would look suspicious if i went out now alone but he said now .

I stood up . "Where are you going?", Sirius asked . "My ravenclaw friend told me to bring her her book because she forgot it with me and she has homework to do .", i said .

Thank god i had a book in hand .
I walked out of the common room and i walked through the halls til i saw Regulus leaning on a wall .

I looked at him and he looked at the ground like the thing he was going to say was going to shatter me.

"What's wrong ?", i asked . He looked up straight into my eyes . "Sirius.", he said and gulped like saying his name is just enough to sore his throat.

"Yeah?", i said waiting for an answer . I was getting anxious . "He threatened to kill him .", Regulus said . I shook my head. "Why why?", i asked and started shaking .

"But if you leave him and stay away from him and your friends he won't do anything to them.", Regulus added . "Why that doesn't make any fucking sense .", i said with tears streaming down my face .

"I know .", he said looking at the ground . "But if you don't do it , he won't hesitate for a second to kill him.", Regulus said .

"But i love him Regulus .", i said .
"If you love him do it .", he said .
"Stay away from your friends as well.", he said and tears streamed uncontrollably.

"Everything is just falling on my head like heavy rocks waiting for me to end .", i sighed . I stood up dropped the book to the floor and went back to the common room wiping my tears.

I entered the common room and they all looked at me . "Sirius.", i called .
"Yeah.", he replied . "Come.", i said and we went to my dorm . The faster i do it , the safer he will be .

He shut the door behind him and he stood looking at me . Scarlett don't cry if you do he will know that there is something wrong .

"Yeah love .", he said and tried kissing my cheek but i took a step backwards .
It shattered my heart . He looked at me with defeat in his eyes .

"Sirius i-.", i said trying not to cry .
He nodded his head waiting for me to talk . "I don't want to do this anymore.", i said and my heart broke even more .

He laughed . "Tell me this is a joke .", he said laughing . I looked at the ground fighting the urge not to cry.
"Come on Scarley tell me it's a joke .", he said but without laughing this time .
"Tell me it's a fucking joke please .", he said with a cracked voice .

"I don't love you anymore .", i whispered trying not to say it loud because if i said it loud it would break him even more . I looked at him . Tears streamed down his face.

"But i loved you.. i- .", he stuttered . He brushed his fingers through his hair trying not to lose his temper .
"Why do you do that ?", he yelled .
"Why?", he whispered .

"I said it .", i said looking at the ground . He pulled my chin upwards .
"Say it in my face and if you said it i will leave you , forever .", he said .

I love him . I will always love him .
For eternity . I have to say it so he'll stay safe . He is the last person i want hurt . He is the last person i want in danger . He is the last person i'd love .

"I don't love you anymore.", i said and a tear slipped from my eyes .
He dropped his arms to his side .
He looked at me with tears falling from his eyes . He took off his necklace and let it fall on the floor . The sound of it falling made my heart tear apart .

"I hate you Scarlett Hart.", he said opened the door and left . I fell to my knees and cried in my hands . I never thought i'd leave him.

Marlene stormed through the door and slammed it behind her. "Why.", she asked . "Scarlett he is fucking breaking the mirrors , why Scarlett?", she asked .

James and Remus stormed through the door . "What the fuck Scarlett?", they said. I hate what i will say but their safety is above everything in my life , i'd rather die than see their lives in danger because of me .

"Stop acting like you are my fucking friends none of you are .", i yelled .

~

Here is me one week after leaving everyone behind . Here is me shattered all over the floors trying to pick my self up but failing miserably.

I sat at the end of the Gryffindor table . Away from all of them and just watched them.

Marlene was laughing at something Remus said , Lily playing with James' cheek , Peter and Mary chatting with smiles on their faces and Sirius sitting staring at his place out of life .

I sat like this every day just watching them , maybe their lives were much better before meeting me .

~

I was walking alone through the halls and here she is Morgan . She pushed me to the ground and i fell , i guess not eating made me weaker than i thought .

"You bitch messed everything up but look now he is free , i can have him all to myself .", she said and kicked me right in the rips over and over again .
She messed once and i felt her kick collide with my right arm.

My mouth busted , nose bleeding and arm broken . I didn't have the power to fight her . "Always weak , you are nothing.", she said and her boots' sound were far away now .

I tried standing up . I took a hold of the wall next to me and started stumbling til i got to the common room . I entered and all of them were scattered in the common room.

Their laughter stopped when i entered like i'm the sadness that dulls their moments . I stumbled inside and lost hold of the wall next to me and fell to my knees coughing.

They didn't move . None of them moved or even flinched that's when i realized that they hate me . They hate me more than anything .

I stood up again stumbling til i entered my dorm and shut the door behind me .
Marlene was sleeping with Lily and Mary, leaving me shivering at night from how much i cry.

~
Sirius

"I'm so mad at her I don't even want to know what happened .", Marlene said .
"I don't think she is okay.", Peter said .
Mary entered the common room .

"Morgan kicked Scarlett in the ribs and broke her arm.", she said . When she fell to the ground , i wanted to stand up and hold her up , i wanted to fix her injuries, i wanted to give Morgan a lesson but here we are away from each other.

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