letter | woosan

𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐞

The days kept going on like this. Wooyoung had only two of his closest friends left while everyone else wouldn’t even pay him a second glance and San tried his best to avoid the other boy as well.

He had stopped reading the little pieces of paper on his table. His smile gone and his clothes went back to being all black.

San couldn’t bear to look the other in the eyes anymore. He prayed that if he pretended that everything was back to the way it was before he started getting these damned notes, everything would be alright again.

He could bear being alone, what he could not stand was that he would not hear Wooyoung chat and laugh with his friends anymore.

That had to be the thing he missed the most and when leaving the other alone was all he had to do to get this back he would gladly accept the price.

There were a few times Wooyoung tried to talk to or contact him but he never got through to him. So the last thing left to do for the blond boy was to one day stand in front of the others door.

When San opened his heart and breathing stopped and for he second he couldn’t believe his eyes until Wooyoung opened his mouth to talk.

“Hey uhm… you haven’t answered me the past two weeks and I just wanted to ask if you are alright?”

There was a little shaking in his voice, missed with insecurity and worry. San felt guilty for a moment. He was surprised the other even minded his disappearance. All he managed was small nod and Wooyoung frowned.

“Can you please tell me what is wrong? Do you really think I am stupid enough not to notice when someone is avoiding me? Did something happen? Did the others say something to you?”

The others… once Wooyoungs friends. What was he even doing in front of this stupid door? San wished he could just leave him alone. It was unbelievable hard for him to ignore the people he had developed feelings for and this little visit doesn’t help.

“No. No one said anything to me. I just don’t think the others should see us together.”

Only after the words were spoken out loud San realized how terrible they sounded. He felt the pain that flickered through Wooyoungs eyes like it was his own.

Then he realize that maybe this was the best way. If Wooyoung would come to hate him for being an idiot he wouldn’t have to run away from him and his own feelings anymore. Then things would really go back to how they were.

But he just couldn’t do it. He couldn’t let Wooyoung believe that he had left him as well as everyone else.

“I am sorry I just… don’t want to get you into any more trouble. I saw how your friends treated you for hanging out with me and I saw that they ignored you since then. I don’t want to ruin everything for you. I don’t want you to lose the people important to you because of me.”

One part of San cringed at the sound of his own words. God he sounded so unbearable stupid.

To his surprise Wooyoungs face showed an expression he didn’t expect at all. Not like he could have pinpointed the emotions in the first place. He seemed… tired? The face of someone who had given up and accepted their defeat.

“How is it possible that you still not see it Choi San?”

With these words whispered from his lips Wooyoung turned around and left a very confused San standing in the doorframe, trying to figure out what the other boy could have meant.