The Start of Time

Chapter 26

There is nothing in this world that can stop Kennedy from her blissful ignorance at this moment. And as much as I hate to say it, I can almost understand her. Not the falling in love part, but the happiness part.

My little arrangement with Declan is almost as perfect as her full on–almost–marriage.

Don't get me wrong. I'm still disgusted with myself for falling into the vomit inducing romance of our dirty little secret. Eating each other's faces every chance we're alone. Feeling super spontaneous instead of going on menial dates. Getting bubbly and giddy just from being in the same room with each other and never wanting to be apart.

As I said, completely and utterly nauseating. Like a deadly virus infiltrating every cell in my body, wrecking its psychological havoc on the temporal lobe of my brain until I've conformed to societal norms.

But, hey, at least the sweeping butterflies aren't accompanied by the terrorizing fear of the impending doom of a real relationship.

"Bro, what the fuck are you smiling for? You just woke up." I hear Chris grumble groggily from the living room. "It's so fucking annoying. Stop looking at me like that. What the hell is wrong with you?"

Declan just shrugs his shoulders casually, grinning at me from across the room, letting me know he's as unconditionally and radiantly happy as I am. My own lips curl into a small smile, and my hand instinctively moves to touch them, a reflex to the soft memories of his lips on mine.

What is he doing to me? It's not supposed to be this way.

If he keeps this up, we're going to be in some serious trouble. The more he gets away with, the less careful he is, and the less careful he is, the more desire and anxiety churn deep within me.

I just wish I could use that desire to spark desire in him because after over a week of teasing, I'm already over waiting.

The weather is fairly mild for October. Not too hot, not too cold. Perfect weather for enjoying brunch outside. The sun glistening brightly, bouncing off the windows. It's the perfect day to enjoy celebrating Kennedy and visiting with everyone.

But instead Declan has screwed with my head. I used to enjoy sitting under the sun, reading a book as the rays refract through the glass or simply trying to enjoy the company of those I haven't seen in a while. Instead, I'm literally thinking about him fucking me up against one of his tall glass windows.

Pinning my arms above my head. His warm breath on my neck, a stark contrast to the cool glass my cheek is pressed against. The thrill of knowing that someone might catch us, fueling the fire of burning desire. Leaving me breathless and shaking until—

I shake my head to empty those thoughts. I can't afford to go there right now. Definitely not. Not only do I have to make this run smoothly for Kennedy, but I also have to make him pay for not fucking me the first time and missing every hint since then. I'm going to take all of his stolen kisses and tease him until he's the one begging this time.

He merely thought he was the one in control because I let him.

I'll start with something simple, like leaving the door open halfway while I change, giving him just enough to keep me on his mind all day.

A black lace matching set, one of his favorite colors, the perfect mix of everyday and elegant. Running my fingertips along my collar bone to pull my hair away from my neck to spritz his favorite perfume. Making it seem as if I'm simply admiring myself in the mirror.

The mirror that gives me the perfect access to his majestic green eyes, mentally tearing me apart while tucking his bottom lip between his teeth.

That's what I'm really admiring.