i wished you loved me like how I do...

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     ⚠️quick mention of abuse⚠️

It's was night time me and Clay were talking for hours I was still in the hospital with a broken right leg. Clay was laying next to me but  he was sleeping. I am getting out of the hospital tomorrow though it will be nice going back. I have really bad times at parties but I feel safer with Clay. Clay just makes my day puts a smile on my face. He is just so kind he tried to fight the with the guy for me. He still got hurt it's impossible to not love him.
Maybe I have a crush on him no no he's just a friend but I don't know do I love him. His smile his wheeze his wheeze is funny he sounds like a tea kettle. I can't have a crush on him what about Ryan but Clay wouldn't ditch me like Ryan did. I never want to be with someone like Ryan he was terrible and abusive. All he did was hurt me who knows were he is now I'm just glad I escaped him. I escaped his mess, his problems I still have bruises from him. I'm just glad Clay will never be like him he is caring, kind and respectful. Why should I even care for a guy like Ryan he is a jackass. Clay is different just built different I'm sounding like Sapnap. What about Sapnap if me and Clay were dating how would Sapnap react. I don't wanna my Sapnap feel left out or alone he would just be a third wheel. I don't wanna risk our friendship or the Dream Team. Sapnap is a great friend he is funny brightens up the mood when everything is low. I slowly opening my eyes seeing Clay's eyes closed the pitch black room. I look over at Clay his eyes are closed his cuts were dried now seeing bruises from fighting. His hair was messy from laying down on the bed. I look at the time it was 10:00 PM  it wasn't so late I have stayed up later before. I can't believe so many things happened in a week not even. Why did we even we go to that party Sapnap said he wanted to impress someone but who. The only sound I focused on was the monitor of my breathing and Clay breathing. It stoped thundering after a while I could admit hospitals were really boring. Hospitals always brought you shitty food except for the jello and ice chips my favorite. When my mom died I was about 14 and when I was in the hospital I ate the jello and chips. I was one of those loner kids who had no friends, toxic family, and trust issues and I still am that person except for the friends part. Clay and Sapnap was basically my first ever friends then Clay invited me to the Dream SMP and more friends. Even when I was a loner kid I played football for a little and I was a great singer apparently. Then after that I went to nursing school for a year then next year here I am. I can be full of surprises I just don't tell people because I interact with people badly. But when I met Clay I never had to act not one bit besides if I did act I would be terrible at it I suck at acting. When I act or lie I laugh or when I laugh in general. I have so many thoughts in my head I can't get out. Clay looked so peaceful sleeping so innocent but who know what he has  planned a man of disguise. Oh my god I love Clay if I didn't why would I be thinking about Clay so much or why I hang out with him so much it makes no sense. Why would I be admiring him if I didn't love him. He won't love me back people have said it themselves I'm a loser. Why couldn't people like me why did I feel alone in the world.

i wished he loved me the way I loved him...

"i love you" I said drifting off to sleep.

It was morning like usual I look to the side of me and George is asleep his head on my chest. He loved snuggling for some reason probably because he had no one when he was younger he mom died when he was 14. 3 years later his dad died I feel bad no one was here for him but he met me and I hope he knows I will always be here for him. It was 9:23 George was always a night person unlike me.

"Hey" someone said knocking at the open door.

"Oh hey Sapnap" I said while waving with my left hand because George was keeping my right hand hostage.

"I see your having a romantic time" Sapnap said jokingly.

"No it's just he had a rough past" I said.

"Also um something happened last night" I said starting to shake a little.

"What is it?" Sapnap said sitting down into the chair near me.

"George was sleeping you know and he said I love you" I said.

"Told you he loves you your just a chicken" Sapnap said.

"Am not" I said.

"Besides he was sleeping so that means he wouldn't have meant it" I said.

"Are you sure because in my words when someone does that in their sleep there dreaming about them" Sapnap said proving a point.

"Do you really think" I said.

"Hell yah and I knew you had a crush on him because first of all you had a crush on him a while ago. And in the airport the girl was saying he was so hot and stuff but he seemed uncomfortable so I said I was his boyfriend" Sapnap said.

"Bros are always here for Bros" Sapnap said.

"I didn't know that happened in the airport" I said.

"Yep and have you seen the way he look at you in the airport and with the glasses" Sapnap said.

"Yeah I guess that was a little strange that has happened to me before so I guess" I said.

"But I am still not gonna tell him I don't wanna make a fool out of myself besides what happens if he doesn't have a crush on me" I said.

"Trust me he loves you trust my words" Sapnap said.

"shut the hell up asshole" George said turning around to the left side going back to sleep.

"God your in love with him" Sapnap said laughing.

"How could you not" I said looking at George.

"mmmmmm" George said.

"Morning" I said slowly tapping on his shoulder.

"hi dreamy" George said slowly waking up.

"It sounds like he's on drugs or some shit" Sapnap dying of laughter.

"Shut up Sapnap" George said.

"Wait Sapnap?" George said sitting up from the bed looking at Sapnap.

"Why hello George" Sapnap said waving.

Authors Note: How is the story so far you like it?

1186 words :)

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