Thought of You (z.m)

Chapter 27 [Edited]

Chapter 27

Zayn’s POV

‘NO! MOM, COME BACK! NOOOOO!’ My eyes shot open to the sound of Rose’s tortured screaming. I looked over to her as she thrashed around with tears streaming down her face in the crack of dawn. I instantly wrapped my arms around her tight and pulled her head closer to me.

‘Shh, Rose. Shh. It’s okay, Rose.’ i whispered in her ear. 

‘MOOOOOM!’ She gave out another tortured scream and my heart shattered. It broke my heart to hear her strangled cries.

‘Shh. Rose, baby. Wake up, Rose.’ I shook her gently and her eyes fluttered open and there were more tears pooling in her eyes.

‘Zayn.’ She sobbed and she buried her head into my chest. I tightened my grip on her body and spoke calming words to her.

‘Shh, it’s just a dream. It wasn’t real.’ I repeated over and over but she never calmed down.

‘It was real.’ She said so quietly that I wouldn’t have heard it if I wasn’t listening so intently. 

‘What do you mean?’ I asked, hesitantly. I wasn’t sure if I should butt in.

‘I...’ She paused and I heard her take a deep breath.

‘You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.’ I whispered in her ear.

‘No, no. I have to tell you.’ She whispered. I pulled back to look into her hazel eyes. The expressions flashing through them scared me. Regret, sorrow, fear, hurt, anger, sadness... it hurt me to see her with all these negative feelings.

‘Rose, babe. It’s okay, tell me another time.’ I practically begged. I hate seeing her like this. 

‘No. I’m telling you now. It’s why I’ve been... iffy lately.’ She breathed. I nodded my head, keeping my eyes on hers. She closed her eyes and breathed in deeply, trying to calm down but failing. I held my breath, in the dim light I can see the slight wince. 

‘My mom was my best friend. She... she was always there for me when no one else was. She always hugged me whenever i came home after school. She was never ever disappointed in me, she always saw the positive sides of everything. Even if I got an F in science, she said she never wanted chemicals in the house anyway.’ She laughed quietly at that. But then her expression turned grim. ‘Even at a young age I was into acting. I always got the lead roles in my drama classes. One day we had to re-enact Romeo and Juliet. i was Juliet and of course my mom came. Afterwards we went to go to a restaurant to celebrate my lead role, like we always do. And on our way I told her about my fight with my so called best friend. And my so called best friend didn’t want to be my friend anymore because... of some reasons. Anyway, my mom was telling me how she was a bitch and that I shouldn’t listen to a word she says and all and she looked over at me and when she looked back we got hit by a car. It wasn’t that bad but we hit a ute with wood planks on the back. The wood planks were on my side and the impact of the car caused the wood planks to slide down. I would’ve gotten hit if... if she didn’t...’ She started to cry strenuously.

I looked into her hazel eyes and I saw remorse. I could see it in her eyes that she wanted herself to die. That she should have died. 

‘She jumped in front of the wood, didn’t she?’ I said before i could stop myself. A loud sob broke from her as she nodded.

‘I should have died! She shouldn’t have jumped in front. it was supposed to be me! If it just hit me, she would still be here. Alive. I should’ve been the one dead!’ She cried out.