quarantine in love • chris evans (bwwm)

twenty-two

"I don't know what to bring." Andi sighed as she stared into her closet. Today was the last day she was spending in Dallas before moving to Boston with Chris indefinitely. While she was excited about seeing Dodger, the thought of meeting Chris's family made her a little nervous. "What if I forget something important? Who knows the next time I'll be in this house?"

"Relax honey. If you forget something, we'll replace it."

"Where will I even put my clothes at? I don't want to be living out of a suitcase for six months."

"Baby." Chris placed his hands on her shoulders and kissed her. "My sisters cleared out at least half of my bedroom closet. It's not as big as the one you have in California but it'll do for now, until we can build our own house."

"What if I hate Boston?" Andi asked the question that'd been in the back of her mind. Because she'd never lived on the east coast, or even visited Massachusetts, she was a little worried about how she'd adjust to Chris's hometown.

"What if you love Boston?"

"Chris, I'm being serious."

"I don't know what you want me to say." He sighed. "Obviously life would be easier for me if you enjoy living Boston but if you don't, there's really nothing I can do but respect that."

"I've never even owned a winter coat and now I'm moving to Boston." She whispered to herself. "It snows in Dallas once every 5 years..."

"Do you want to go to Boston Andi?" Chris asked. It seemed like they closer they were to leaving Dallas, the less she wanted to go. "Be completely honest."

"Yes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." She repeated truthfully. "I want do to move to Boston with you but I'm a little intimidated."

"Why are you intimidated my love?"

"I know nothing about Boston. I don't know where you live or where the nearest grocery store is or what the best restaurants are... I have no friends there, no family, no car..." Andi mumbled before plopping down on the floor. "I don't want to have to give up my life and rely on you for everything. I hate that feeling of dependence."

Chris took a second to process her words before sitting in front of her. He was disappointed that those thoughts didn't cross his mind and he didn't anticipate Andi feeling so apprehensive about moving to Massachusetts. "I'm so sorry. I didn't even think about how hard this would be on you."

"I do wanna go to Boston with you." She reaffirmed. "I'm just terrified about what comes next."

"What do you mean?"

"I know it's not fair for me to be so hesitant, especially when I agreed to move, but I can't control the incessant noise in my head asking what happens if this or what happens if that..."

"That's normal babe." Chris assured. "I would love if you shared those what if's with me. Maybe I can give you some piece of mind."

"What if we get tired of each other? How long before we can't stand to be in the same room?" Andi questioned. She and Chris had been dating for just under a month and were still in their 'honeymoon stage' but she knew that would wear off eventually, especially considering the fact that they were going to be trapped in a house together for months on end. "When we were in L.A., I had my place and you had yours. Even though we were together 98% of the time, we still had the option to get away if we needed to. In Boston, there's nowhere for me to go."

"I understand your concerns and I see exactly where you're coming from." Chris nodded. Although he wasn't worried about he and Andi growing tired of one another, the thought did cross his mind. In a normal and covid-free world, either one could easily leave the house and run some errands to blow off steam; however, that option was currently not available. "How about this: if you or I are starting to feel overly annoyed or smothered by the other, we agree to spend a few hours in different rooms. If we're proactive about it, it shouldn't be a problem."

Andi leaned forward and kissed him. "This is why I'm marrying you, sexy proactive problem solver." 

"Anything for you, angel."

"Do you think we're ever gonna get tired of having sex with each other?"

"Definitely not." He replied confidently. "We might slow down in terms of frequency but there's no way I could possibly get tired of you, of that. And if for some reason I do, there's another hole in the back."

Andi opened her mouth to speak and closed it immediately afterwards which caused Chris to laugh. Although he spoke in a joking tone, it was obvious there was some truth to his words. "WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS?"

"I just wanted to hear that beautiful laugh." He chuckled. "I love you."

"I love you more." She smiled. "I feel like you're always reassuring me meanwhile you have no insecurities in our relationship whatsoever."

"That's not true. While I don't have insecurities about our relationship per se, I do have insecurities about my role in our relationship."

"What does that even mean?"

"There are certain things about our future that make me a little anxious." He revealed. "However, those things aren't so pressing that I need to bring them up at this very moment."

"Can you tell me one? I wanna play good fiancée and reassure you for a change."

"Sometimes I think about the fact that you're almost 10 years younger than me. Let's say we do have our first child in 5 years. I'll be 42." Chris began. "We both want multiple children and unless we're lucky enough to have twins or triplets in one go, I'm gonna be practically 50 by the time we're done. That's terrifying Andi. The thought that I might not be there to walk my little girl down the aisle scares me."

As soon as Chris finished speaking, Andi wrapped her arms around him tightly. She had no idea that while she was thinking about dealing with snow in Boston every winter, he was thinking about how he's going to keep up with his children as he aged. He was turning 38 this year while Andi hadn't even reached age 30 yet. "Thank you for sharing that with me."

"I'm sorry that got a little dark."

"No. Don't apologize! Your feelings are completely valid." She spoke while running her fingers up and down his back. "I couldn't be more excited to create little humans with you. And I know I mentioned that I don't want to be pregnant at all for at least another five years but that doesn't mean that I don't want children in that timeframe. Maybe we can explore other options like surrogacy. At least for the first one."

Chris shook his head and placed his hand on Andi's flat abs. "I want our babies growing in there, if possible. I only wanna explore other options if absolutely necessary."

"Five years is a long time."

"Time is a social construct that has no meaning outside of the one assigned to it by humans. Time doesn't exist." He spoke in Andi's voice, producing a phrase that he was sure she would say. She always had a way of making him expand his views on certain topics by forcing him to really think about the societal constructs and standards attached. He didn't even realize just how genius a movie Shrek was until Andi broke down the plot and revealed the hidden messages within the movie.

"I can't stand you." She laughed. "But you didn't lie."

"I learned from you."

"I'm really glad you told me that though." Andi smiled. "I think it's important that we continue to share thoughts like this as they arise. The last thing I want you to be thinking about is dying."

"Well I wasn't... but now I am."

"Oh... sorry."

Chris laughed and gave her a short kiss before standing up. He pulled Andi up along with him. "Let's go get ready for our last dinner with your mom and sister."

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