Oc Reviews! (Closed For Now)

Chen Xue

I like this, however, I feel like you should leave out the part where it is useless and that he gets rid of it. I think this because you're pretty much giving away a story element to anyone who reads your character sheet, rather than letting the reader be surprised by his actions in your story. I would replace that part with just (kind of like a toy sword that becomes more powerful and weapon-like once spiritual energy is embued into it). Just a thought, but I do love the idea.

Personality(pre-blackening and post-blackening have a somewhat different personality): Chen Xue is known to be a pretty closed off and logical person who doesn't let his emotions get to him. This is because with all the emotional trauma he had gone through as a child, he didn't want to feel emotion, because pain and suffering were all that he could feel. He has learned to numb himself with entertainment and work. Additionally, he doesn't know how to handle other people being fond of him. Because barely anyone was fond of him, he didn't know how to deal with these emotions and express his gratitude, which makes him come off as an ungrateful asshole sometimes. When someone is kind to him, he wants to repay that kindness.

I would say to just be careful with this archetype because this type of personality tends to be used a lot when writing characters that are in high government positions.

He is cold and distant to most people, only opening up to people he can trust, which are few and far between. Due to his lack of human contact and healthy relationships, he distances himself from everyone and doesn't understand human emotion well. However, after years of observations as a child when he tried to see how normal people were, he is great at putting on facades and faking his own personality. However, this led to a disconnect from reality, and sometimes he can't tell whether he's putting on a facade or actually feeling emotions. When he was young, he found his life worthless and was willing to give it up for someone more worthy. However, after his blackening (getting poisoned) he stops thinking of the good in the world and becomes selfish. He puts his own interests in mind before others, and it isn't until the death of Hua XiRui(this will be explained later) when he comes to his senses and becomes a better person. Another aspect of post-blackening Chen Xue is that he is very paranoid. He thinks that he has worked extremely hard for everything he has and is unwilling to let anyone come near him. Pre-blackening Chen Xue was mostly pretty serious who laughs at jokes, but doesn't often tell them. Post-blackening Chen Xue's humor is dripping with cynicism and self-deprecation. Sometimes, when his past trauma and paranoia catches up to him, he doesn't get enough sleep, causing him to become somewhat irritable. Is rather insecure about his appearance due to how feminine he looks and the scars on his face. He tries to cover them up (masks, bandages, really weird edgy emo bangs, etc), but it just looks weirder.

I am kind of confused, you say he IS cold and distant but then say years later he is able to put facades. So my question is which is he now? I get the part about before and after the blackening because that happens overtime throughout the story. The beginning of this however sounds like it belongs in the backstory because he WAS like this BACK THEN if that makes sense.

He has morals and doesn't want to hurt people if it doesn't achieve anything, but will put his goals over his morals any day. When faced with difficult situations, he thinks things out and doesn't let his emotions get to him. Sometimes, he stays up overnight thinking about things, leading to his lack of sleep and being irritable.

This makes sense because it is kind of like making ethical dilemmas which is what leadership is about sometimes. Like the idea of "Sacrifice the few to save the many". Morally, sacrificing people sounds wrong, however, logically in order to save the many, it makes sense.