She's A Trendy Designer On Her Wrists(May Be Triggering To People Who Self Harm)

Chapter 1

The rusted metal chains of the ancient swing creaked as I swung back and forth, moving my legs in a rhythmic motion. My iPod was turned to full blast filling my ears with breakdowns and screaming, this was how I blocked out the rest of the world. It was so peaceful, those moments when I was fully absorbed into the lyrics, I felt as though nothing could touch me. The icy wind bit into me and I pulled my hood up catching my tangle of inky black hair inside and I looked up to the overcast sky. The sun was obscured by hoards of angry looking grey clouds, no wonder it was so cold.I looked down at my frozen hands which were sore against the metal, then shut my eyes.Here no one would bother me,this was my sanctuary. Suddenly one of the most annoying laughs I think I've ever heard broke the peace and I opened my eyes. My stomach lurched as I saw who was entering the abandoned park.

I grabbed my bag that was lying on the ground, jumping off the swing with my ipod in my hand and attempting to run away from the gang of boys that had just entered the park. I turned around and just when I thought I'd lost them they were gaining on me.

"Hey Emo!" Leo shouted while the boys walked up to her laughing

"Yeah, hey cutter!" Max shouted

"Go away, leave me alone" I said shyly

Leo slowly swaggered up to me saying "Yeah what you gunna do?"

He was standing right in front of me now looking deep into my eyes it really looked like he was going to hurt me. I let out a little yell hoping someone would hear and come and help but no one replied i think i just made things worse for my self.

"Shut the fuck up!" Leo said pushing me heavily on to the floor and spitting on me.

"Come on guys lets go and leave her to run off and cut herself." said Leo.

I watched the boys running out of the park, leaving me lying in a pile of mud in tears, this wasn't the first time they had done something like this and it probably wont be the last because they seem to pick on me all the time.

With tears streaming down my face I got myself up off the ground after making sure Leo and his gang were long gone. I hated them so much- why did they always have to pick on me? They had done since the very first day of Secondary School and will probably carry on until I finally get to leave the hell hole. I felt a trickle of unwelcome water hit my cheek and join the tears which were still flowing. I didn't reallyow why I was crying, I suppose I let little things get to me too easily. All the mean things anyone had ever called me echoed around my head- faggot, cutter, emo and shit were among the most commonly used. I had been called them so much I guess I was starting to believe I was those things. As the heavens opened and the rain got heavier I swung my bag over my shoulder and hurriedly made an exit over the fence which was a short cut to my house.

I walked back on to the pathway leading to my house. By that time the rain was just hammering down. When I got to my front door I puled out my keys from my pocket and twisted to open the door. My dog, Jinxx, must have heard because he came running to the door barking, in what I guess was a welcome but not even he could cheer me up. I hung my hoodie up to dry and ran up to my bathroom to take a shower in the hope it would calm me down. It didn't and I still felt terrible about what the boys said to me. I had already contemplated cutting before but now those guys called me a cutter I might as well go cut. Out of the corner of my eye I could see a razor glinting at me some what invitingly and I picked it up. I had to break the razor to get the blade out but I managed to do it after a while. I stood there, my heart pounding so hard I thought it would burst out of my chest. debating whether to do it or not...