My Forbidden Fruits (August Alsina) Series The First Chapter

42.[Where She Concludes What Her Heart Desires]

[Phoebe---The Next Day]

I flicked my eyelids open, altering them to the bright rays of sunlight. I couldn't even move, my body could but my mind couldn't. The events of the previous night replayed in my head. Terror, yet I found myself rationalizing what happened. I wasn't angry at him, I was not. I don't why. It's almost as if I felt like I was okay with it. I've always been a hopeless emotional lover, and I when I start I can't stop, but I never showed that to August because I hated him. I despised his guts, so I never felt I'd ever have to be vulnerable towards him, that's why I always call him names, and deny how I feel.

After he reached his 'climax' last night in the bathroom, he just...left me there, and laid down on the bathroom floor. I climbed down from the sink and crawled into the bed. He soon after threw up every intestine in his stomach. I tried to help him, but he wouldn't let me. He kept saying that he was sorry, and that he warned me about when he gets angry, when he gets furious but I didn't listen.

He kept saying that it wasn't his fault that he's the way he is. That he wish he knew his father and he made me cry, I wept. I felt so poignant towards this man already and only seems like we've known each other for a day. People say it takes a while to love somebody, but it really doesn't when feelings come rushing in, they don't go away. You can't force them to either.

I didn't sleep last night. My eyes were stalk open like an owl's and though I couldn't understand why I didn't tell him it was hurting, or that I felt extreme discomfort, when he got in the bed and threw his arm over my body, I felt...I felt so flustered with agony , that I didn't go to sleep until a few hours ago. I never expected that to happen. He's always so gentle with me, it flabbergasted me.

I got out of the bed, looking down at my aching body. I quickly looked back at the bed touching feeling for blood but there was none. I stood up feeling the beams of pain shoot through my body as I look on the floor for any blood but surprisingly there was none. He wasn't in the bed; he wasn't in the room even. I quickly put on the change of clothes I brought over, and went into the bathroom, brushing my teeth.

I looked at myself in the mirror and I my eyes started to tear up. I turned my neck to the side looking at the lip stains , that he left across my neck and jawline. I part of me wanted to grab my bags and flee this house, this thing we have going on, this relationship.

But another part of me couldn't. It was like I had been running away from every man these past months and I've found comfort in August and I don't want to run anymore. He's changed a piece of me and then I'd just be living the desolated, remarkably lonesome, dogmatic life I live and frighteningly, it's almost as if...I need him, though I've always said I don't. But why? So easily? It's almost an intoxicatingly narrow love.

I looked away from the mirror and I washed my face quickly, drying my tears in the towel. I slowly walked down the stairwell, seeing him speaking to his mother. Dear Lord. I tried to turn away but my body wasn't moving fast enough.

"Oh Darling, you're up." She called out to me. Darling? Oh no, she knows?

I slowly turned around facing them. "Hello, Mrs. Alsina." I flushed a ruby hue, I waved, stepping dow the final stairs.

"She been sleepin' all mornin'." He added, gazing at me. I tried not to keep eye contact with him, to keep me from making the ugliest face possible and start sobbing.

"I see." She smiled and I gazed up at the clock seeing it was past 11. Oh Dear, she's going to thing I'm horridly lazy.

"I've just been really tired. Lately." I small smiled.