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Winter Ball. Part 3.

For @Fake_Brit who guessed 4 hours after LongLiveTheMagic! An honourable mention! Sarah, xx

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Matthew Sutter.

I didn’t move. I couldn’t move. I didn’t speak. I couldn’t speak. I just stared in amazement.

Matthew Sutter.

“It’s ok, Anah,” he says with a shake of his head after a long drawn out silence on both sides. “I knew you’d react like this. And it’s ok. I mean… really. Just let me down easy, ok? But first, I wanted you to have this.”

Matt held out a single white long stem rose tied with black ribbon. It was beautiful and simple and perfect and… Why did Matt’s voice sound so hurt? I blinked down at the rose, and then let my eyes flutter up to meet Matt’s downcast gaze. He looked defeated and lost.

“Anah, take the flower,” Matt said, pushing the rose closer to me until he practically forced it into my hand. “Please. Then I can get started on wallowing in self-pity.”

I held the rose in my hand but couldn’t bring myself to look at it. Instead, I kept my gaze on Matt’s face, trying to figure out where this all went wrong. He’d looked so happy one second, and then… I’m not sure. He looked sad and I hated seeing him like this. I had to think of a way to make him smile again. He looked so handsome when he smiled. So much, like the Matt that I fell in love with.

“Matt-”

“Don’t,” he cut me off, taking a step away from me and increasing the distance between us. His body stiffened, as if he was steeling himself for defeat, and his face lost all traces of emotion. “It’s fine, Anah. Like I said, I expected this. I just never thought it would hurt this much, that’s all.”

I watched as he turned away, heading towards the door without as much as a glance in my direction. My heart sank to my stomach and I felt the tears forming in my eyes, but I wasn’t about to break down. No, I was going to stand up and fight. Fight for Matt, and fight for us. He couldn’t shake me that easily.

“You said that you’d never hurt me,” I called after him in a challenging voice. He froze mid step and shook his head dejectedly. “You said that you would never hurt me on purpose. Did you mean that?”

He spun to face me with pained look on his face. “Of course I meant it,” he answered in an unbearable whisper.

“Then get back here,” I ordered him, almost going as far as stomping my foot petulantly. He frowned but did as he was told, coming to a stop an arm’s length from me. I bridged the gap in two small strides and took one of his hands in mine. “Just tell me one thing, ok? Do you love me?”

Matt blinks, his mouth hanging open before he closes it just as quick. “I love you to MACS0647-JD and back,” he smiles sadly.

“Good,” I nod decisively, amazed that he had remembered the name of the most distant object in the universe.

Then I smirk up at him. He frowns down at me confusedly and takes a step backwards, inspecting my face before sighing heavily and rubbing his face with his spare hand.

“Anah?” He says my name like it’s the most precious thing in the world, and my insides melt. “Why do you have that guilty look on your face?”

Should I tell him? I had been harboring a secret from Matt for weeks, one so big that I could barely contain it myself. But now that Matt had called me out on it, I knew that it was time to tell him.

“Ah, about that,” I say playfully. “Matt, I have a confession to make.”

Matt’s eyes bear down on me and I shift uncomfortably under his gaze. When he doesn’t say anything, I wince, turn my attention towards the ground, and mutter my confession. I look up from under my eye lashes to see Matt’s eyes on me.

“What?” He asks, his voice void of emotion. “Say that again.”

I wasn’t sure if it was a matter of not having heard me, or if Matt was too astounded by my confession, but I said the words again, clearer this time so that there was no confusion.

“I knew it was you, Matthew.”