Off Ones Rockers II • Lashton

Chapter Forty

Chapter Forty

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"Hi Luke!" Alex exclaimed as soon as he appeared on the blondes screen.

Luke smiled and muttered a similar response. He had his headphones over his head, and a hood covering them. His door was shut - his mother the only person home, but he didn't want anyone hearing anything.

"Are you okay?" the therapist asked, inspecting the blonde through the blurry picture. He looked a little tired - which wasn't unusual, but it would be nice for the blonde to finally overcome the fatigue now that he was at home.

Luke nodded, before stating quietly. "I don't want anyone to hear, mum is still home, she doesn't go back to work for another week yet."

Alex chuckled understandingly. "You don't have to say anything you don't want to - you could type it if you wish, but the same rules apply. I won't tell anyone that is not part of your team unless I feel you are putting yourself at harm."

The blonde understood, and he knew that he wasn't doing anything dangerous - he thought he was doing okay.

"I spoke with your mum last night, to see how she thought you were settling in - I imagined she told you." Luke looked down and smiled, he had ironically listened in on their conversation, wanting to know what he was in for today. If she had told him anything that was not true.

"She's struggling," Luke admitted, knowing she said that too. "We all know I can be difficult."

The therapist laughed, the blonde had been difficult and testing, but it was his job. "It's only been a couple of days Luke, she's never done this before. But, she is starting to find it easier, and I think that's because you are as well. Am I right about that?"

Luke stared over at his wall and thought about it for a while. Alex let him being, knowing the boy often reflected and calculated his answers before saying anything.

Luke had sat down and attempted to eat every meal he was given. Breakfast was usually fairly easy, he was usually hungry. Sometimes he found lunch a bit pointless - he didn't like how he sometimes forgot to have it at a certain time and then dinner due to its sheer proportion was always a struggle.

"I think I'm doing okay," Luke confirmed. "I think my main struggle is lunch though - I'd rather change it for snacks or something."

Alex looked down at the documents beside him, observing the boys plan. The lunch he had selected was nothing different from the ward - it was nothing too difficult either. "How come Luke?"

The fifteen-year-old looked down. "Sometimes I forget what the time is, or just don't want it - it's just out of place. I can have breakfast and dinner at set times."

Alex nodded before asking. "Your mother said you're considering going back to school?"

"It'll give me a sense of purpose," Luke responded. "I like learning too."

Alex wasn't sure if Luke was quite ready for society yet, he was still pretty vulnerable and from what he heard it took a while for him to settle back into living with the people in his house - the people he should be the most carefree with.

"You don't think it's a good idea?" Luke asked a little downheartedly after his therapist didn't respond.

Alex looked up and sighed. "It's a difficult one Luke. I can really see it benefiting you because I know how important structure is. But, society is unkind and you are going to face questions if you go back."

Luke looked over to his shelf where his school work sat, homework that he was supposed to hand in the day he went to the hospital - his schoolbag still packed. "I would really like to go back."

"Okay," Alex said understanding. "Talk to your mum about it, and get her to see what the school can do for you. Because you will have to be monitored during lunch. And you are still weak Luke, this is going to tire you more."

Luke simply shrugged. "It'll make me more hungry."

"You need to take your time Luke. You shouldn't rush this. Go at your own pace. If you can't eat lunch, you can't. We are all going to pressure you - but it's better you tell your mother that you are struggling she can let us know. Because if you're eating it just because you see it as a requirement we are going to end up going in a circle again."

Luke closed his eyes and spun sideways slightly on his chair. "Why is this all so complicated? I just want it all to be over."

The therapist smiled sadly. He had heard the blonde say this countless times before, but each time there was only more frustration. "This is part of you Luke, and I'm afraid you are stuck with it forever. But if we master this now - if you really take this seriously and work with all the advice we are giving you - when you do recover you shouldn't ever fall back down as hard again."

"How long do you think it would take?" Luke asked curiously, he did really want it to be over.

"It varies Luke, some people take months others years - some never."

"Never?" the blonde responded shocked. "Does that mean they are like this forever?"

"Possibly, in a lot of cases Luke they are beyond help and sadly die."

Luke bit his lip anxiously. "Do you think I'm beyond help?"

Alex shook his head confidently. "No. There have been times where you have been near impossible. But, you want to recover. Look where you are, all of this you've done because you want to. You want to talk to me, you could have hung up. But, you do want the help, Luke."

"I do want help," Luke agreed reassuringly. "It's sad that some people don't. It's not fair is it that they don't get that opportunity?"

The man nodded in agreement, watching the blonde who was now deep in thought. He could tell the conversation had evoked something in the boy and was hopeful it had built another block for him to finally escape this disorder hole.

He knew Luke was lucky that his brain wasn't as troubled as others. That he did get that opportunity. But, he also knew that Luke was unlucky too. It had been five months and the blonde was still far from recovery - Sid himself admitting he had never seen a case that bad.

He'd never tell the patient this of course knowing it would only destroy his determination for recovery when realising it was so far away, no light ahead. They would allow him to create little lights that he thought was the end. But, they were only little holes in the tunnel, that led to a new one that was closer to the surface.

"No it's not," he agreed. "But don't be too hard on yourself if you are struggling, okay? Because you are allowed to struggle. It is normal. And only through struggling and learning from those mistakes can you actually succeed."

-

Actually quite happy with this one. I hope maybe there was something useful in there for someone who needs it.

Please let me know what you think.

Thank you so much for reading.